If I had to describe the State of the World today in one word, I’d say “insane”:
Exhibiting a severely disordered state of mind
From my seat on the bus, it looks like the collective Intellect of the planet has lost Its mind. No one knows what to think anymore. The shock of the transparency that’s sweeping the globe—everyone’s true nature coming out, including Mother Nature— creates a cognitive dissonance, leaving our minds fluctuating between numb and constant conflict. Nothing is predictable and anything can happen at any time.
Watching the news and looking at the state of the world can leave me hopeless, even terrified. Talk about the End Times. We’ve hit the survival level of needed change, so change is happening, whether we like it or not.
What are we to do in a world that seems so out of control?
I believe my part is to make peace in myself, and then make peace with the state of the world. Believe me, I do not say these words lightly. We’ve had two murders in my family. Making peace with those events forced me to deeply challenge my beliefs about the nature of life and death, my purpose, forgiveness, eternal life.
Finding peace with the world, just as it is, is a similar challenge. How do we make peace with an insane dictator, an idiotic president, a war machine, natural disasters, monster storms, or any of the other disparaging inequities and horrific conflicts happening all around us?
I believe we are here to be a part of creating an elegant transition: to use our own love to guide the next step in this evolution of human consciousness that started long before we were born and will carry on long after we are gone. We are here to become the change and be the love we are looking for and that the world so desperately needs.
We came here to change our own operating system from one of fear and conflict to one of love and unity. We are here to learn to make decisions for the good of all. Regardless of what is happening around us, we have been given power over ourselves—our thoughts, feelings, senses, and decisions. We have been given the choice to act in love, or not.
That is the good news! That no matter what anyone else does, we don’t have to allow it to sway us in how we act. No one can take our self-love away from us but us.
Einstein and the Party have a brilliant way of framing this that brings me great peace and hope. Please join us for our next live 2017 RE-Boot on Sunday, November 19 at 9 AM Central. I have no doubt they will have much to say on this subject. It’s sure to be uplifting and inspiring, a much-needed condition considering the state of the world right now.
Remember, when the plane is going down, put on your own oxygen mask first. Let’s get ourselves operating in love first and foremost, and then may we have the greatest influence possible on our local universe. And if anyone can give us some practical step-by-step instructions for how to self-love, it’s Einstein.
Welcome back to our 2017 RE-Boot Series! After an event-filled summer break of music, mayhem and a fall down the stairs, we’re back, reporting from Paris for #6. Looking forward to catching up and reconnecting with you and the Party. Hope you can join us. If not, watch for the download posting.
On the night of August 26, I fell down 20 wooden stairs, hit a concrete sidewalk, continued down three more granite stairs and landed in the yard below.
As I was tumbling, I remember thinking, “This might not be good.”
When I finally stopped, I stood up, checked my neck, back and general condition, and realized I had broken my wrist. After a trip to the emergency room, surgery was scheduled for several days later to put in a metal plate.
Luckily, the fall happened on the last night of my three-week musical tour. Not only had the tour ended literally two hours earlier, but the fact that I had only broken my wrist was nothing short of miraculous.
After coming through surgery, I began the healing process, devoting my energy to the intention that I would make a rapid and full recovery. At first, I kept reliving the fall, over and over. It was traumatic. I wondered what allowed me to fall in such a way as to not damage anything but my wrist. Was it just luck that I did not break my neck, hip(s), leg(s) or other bones, or end up paralyzed, brain damaged or flat our dead?
In a reading I did for my sister last week, Einstein said this about my fall:
The greatest healing power that you have is your own self-love. There’s a new kind of layer of supernatural awareness that surrounds your bodies now. It’s about not hiding your body from your soul. Whatever it was in Barbara’s fall that allowed her body to not break, her neck to not snap—whatever those magical intentions were at this point, we are not quite articulate in how to describe the neurological connections between that Greater Barbara who was (think of it as dancing, or maybe performing surgery) instructing [her body], “Don’t hit there. Don’t hit there.” How did the energy cross-reference from her bigger self to her physical body? What was the intersection of intelligence and bodily response that allowed that to happen?
Our Einstein tells us that we nurture synchronicity when we allow Intuition to be in charge of making decisions. Bypassing the logic of the Intellect, Intuition will guide us to the next most advantageous step for the good of the whole. Is Einstein saying above that the system is so ingrained in how I operate that it works even in the case of falling down the stairs?
Would that explain the other events in the past several years that could have ended poorly? The hit-and-run crash that totaled my car in 2011 that I walked away from, the Wimberley Flood in 2015 that I was only blocks uphill of, the terrorist attack in Paris later that year that was right around the corner from my hotel—could my “good luck” be a greater form of self-love?
The truth it, it’s a grand experiment and we are the researchers as well as the lab rats. Einstein has given us the road map and step-by-step instructions for changing our own lives first and foremost. From that inner change comes the outer manifestation of the inner peace and self-love we create by aligning to Compassion.
I don’t know the answer. I do know I dedicate myself to living aligned to Compassion and that has changed my life. In fact, at my last doctor’s visit on October 31, he declared my healing was six weeks ahead of schedule and gave me a clean bill of health. Just in time to head to Paris, where I will be for the next month or so, living the life, working on music, singing some jazz, and immersing myself in yet another effort to live fully, richly, deeply while still in physical form.
So far, so good.
In gratitude for my good fortune and extraordinary gifts, from now until the end of the year I am happy to offer a full one-hour reading for $75.
0:00:00.0 Barbara: Good morning! It is Sunday, May 21, 2017. I am Barbara With, and we are here with the Party. Partyof12.com is where you can find all things Einsteinian from beyond the grave, news from the Party of 12, and of course information about Conflict REVOLUTION, our imagined Einstein’s miraculous process for world peace one person at a time, starting with you—or me. I’ll start with me, and you can start with you.
Today we are coming from Lake Superior, on Madeline Island, on a beautiful day to be alive, as far as I’m concerned. I am excited about the show. I’m going to introduce our guest a little later, but first a recap.
This is our fifth meeting this year, and looking back on the intention of the Re-Boot series, rebooting our operating systems was the intention for all of us coming together and participating in our own way in our own lives to create the perspective of world peace, one person at a time, starting with us.
Over the past six months I have been to Standing Rock. I went to Paris and Copenhagen, to Tromsø, Norway, an island way close to the Arctic Circle. I was in Oslo. I went back to Standing Rock during the veterans’ gathering there, spent a bunch of time in Minneapolis. I went to Jamaica, then to Denver, Charleston, New Orleans, Corpus, and then back to Denver, and here I am again. I want to say thank you to the universe. I’m so grateful to be alive at this exciting time when we can change the course of defining who we are, defining our language. Our guest will help reiterate that as we redefine ourselves, we emerge as more generative, more peace-oriented beings, with peace generating from within us and spreading out into our local universes.
I’m so grateful, and I hope you are, too. I’ve been formulating a new book in my head. I know I said I maybe wasn’t going to do that, but I’m inspired by this work, especially the work we’ve been doing. I’m thinking about the stories of Conflict REVOLUTION, how it’s miraculously transformed situations, lives, perspectives. That or a romance novel. Or maybe some erotica.
I want to update on my Trigger of Trump. What triggered me about him in January was not him, per se. It wasn’t a direct mirror, but rather his opponents who wanted to call him out on his bad behavior but refused to look at that same bad behavior in their candidate. That was my sound bite, which you can clearly see revolved back to me and gave me plenty of room to learn about darker parts of myself that might be perpetuating these things. This led then into the next few months of the conflict of “Assumptions and Miscommunications,” where I perceived somebody was making assumptions about me, and so I started to revolve it and found out how many times I made assumptions.
This has gone on as the year as progressed, and what I’ve learned is: the fewer assumptions, the more synchronicity. That’s my personal testimony of my life. I can’t prove it. You know that I’m kind of a scientist and I keep track of these things, and it appears in my life that synchronicity has greatly increased, on a daily, an hourly basis. That’s exciting.
To sum up: when you’re doing Conflict REVOLUTION, you have to be prepared to go on a journey where you don’t know where you’re going. If you start out in January and think, “This will be about Trump”—a listener wrote in and said, “Yeah, I hate Trump, too.” And I thought, “No, that’s not quite it.” That’s not quite how Conflict REVOLUTION works. Which led to me and the trainers Robin and Cathy presenting “Conflict REVOLUTION 101”, which is available. You start out where you think you’re going and you end up somewhere better and much different than you could imagine. So I get synchronicity after following this lead.
Anyway, you can look up that episode, I think I’ve also linked it to the Conflict REVOLUTION page at Partyof12.com, if you want to find out the process. It’s a process. It has a lot of leeway for you to build the process to absolutely fit your own needs and worldview. That’s the idea. This isn’t about me telling you how to do it, it’s about me showing you how it works and then you making your own operating system for yourself, for how it fits for you. It’s such exciting work. I wanted to report some of that good news.
I also want to say that I’ve had a very strange experience that I want to continue to share on this particular set of airwaves, because this is why I created this set of airwaves, so I could share these things. A very old friend of mine just passed away, Lonnie Knight, an amazing musician, a man I played in bands with when I first got into music when I was 17. I met him when I was 17. When I was 18 and 19 we were in bands traveling back and forth from northern Minnesota down to Austin and back again, the trio of him and me and Fred Argir, who is also from northern Minnesota, who moved to Austin.
Lonnie had come down with esophageal cancer, but he was reporting good things about his progress. He never stopped playing. We decided we would do a tour together, the three of us, this summer, so I started booking it in August. On the 6th of May in the morning, he posted on his Facebook page, “I’ve got two hours to two days.” It threw me into a perplexed state of, “I feel uncomfortable thinking about—I can’t get to him. Do I text him goodbye?” Even calling him seemed odd, but the idea of a Facebook death was at first a little repulsive to me, I have to admit. I said, “I will not participate in such nonsense.” And then I took a breath and I started to watch his page. His beloved partner Patti was posting that they were reading posts together and sharing the love in his hospital room. He had thousands of friends, people piping up, sharing their love. And I thought, oh my gosh, what a beautiful thing! You know you have this much time. Nobody wants to die of esophageal cancer, but you know you have this much time and you get to have all this love before you launch.”
So I joined in and got to post pictures of him and me hugging in 2013 and things from the past, we got to share all of that. It was a very unusual experience, especially because you know me to be somebody who talks to dead people, so knowing that when he passes anyway as I’m working with him, and he’s saying, “Maybe I can’t make these gigs because I’ll be too tired from chemo,” and I wasn’t going to say, “And what if you’re dead?” You just don’t do that when someone is still alive.
And now here we are. He’s not really dead. I mean, he’s passed away, but now he’s having a new experience, a new relationship, with me, anyway. I’m going on with Fred to do a tribute to him, so now I’m learning all his music and it’s becoming the kind of joyful funfest that I usually have when I’m connected with people who have passed who are seeking to help be a part of the new definition we’re creating. Yes, it’s sad that we die, but on the other hand, if there’s an afterlife like Einstein has clearly explained ad infinitum for 30 years, then it’s just a new state of communication, of how we communicate.
As we teach here, in [our] Einsteinian World, a huge part of it is the non-physical, even when we’re in our bodies. Even when we’re alive right now, 90% of this is a non-physical experience in the physical world, which is a tiny bit of it. But the most important part, if you’re going to be a human being, is to get into that three-dimensional, four-dimensional world in your body and perceive the human experience and live it.
And now people like Leslie [Stewart] and Ken [Routson] and all of us here on the Einstein network devote ourselves not only to understanding the map of the non-physical but intending to use it for the benefit of the good of the whole at the root level. The commitment that we want to make decisions in our lives for the good of everyone involved in whatever that is, whether it’s family decisions or work decisions or decisions about one’s own inner life. We’re working for the good of the whole system. Otherwise, why would you put old, used, charred spark plugs in your car? You need all systems running well.
So it will be an interesting time putting this band together and having Lonnie present. And Fred, too, has reported that Lonnie has come to him and in his young, sassy way, which I can totally see Lonnie doing (laughs), telling him to “Get over it!” Being off, busy learning. Plus, I gave Lonnie Einstein et al.: Manifestation, Conflict REVOLUTION and the New Operating System a few months before he passed, and he said he was anxious to tear into it. So who knows with that story? I am grateful for all of this study in afterlife that we’ve been doing together.
In a little bit we’ll bring on our special guest today, Ken Routson. If you listened to last month’s Re-Boot, we had Ken’s spiritual partner Leslie Stewart talking about joy, a fabulous episode. If you missed it, download it, please! It’s amazing. There was some wonderful follow-up with my sister. Let’s just say, without going into too much detail, that joy did show itself in that situation we talked about.
I met Ken a long time ago. I bought his first book, Beliefology: Raise Your Consciousness to Wealth, Health & Happiness! I was flummoxed at how Einsteinian it was in its core redefining of what we believe in. I don’t think we had much communication then. But when he came to me with his book The Gifts of Autism & Alzheimer’s to work with him as a publisher’s helper, like Santa’s helper, I helped with that book, which was really interesting to me.
Before we bring Ken on, I want to share about the client I had, Dorothea, who changed my life, and her autistic son. I think he was 33 at the time, Nick. He was severely autistic; he had never spoken a word. He had the familiar Sufi-like hand movements. He was obsessed with shuffling cards and flipping through magazines. He made high, squeaky dolphin noises. But he and his mother had a telepathic communication. She felt all her life as if he talked to her in her head, so she hired me to channel him with the purpose of proving to her – or not – that she was really doing this.
As you might believe or understand, it was proven quite quickly. I think maybe we had three readings. She finally said, “That’s it. I know. That’s him in my head. It’s been him in my head. Thank you very much.”
My presence with him, because he didn’t speak, most of it was non-physical communication, was completely mystic. It was the first time I’d sat in front of somebody who was in this state. I felt as if I were sitting in front of a mystic. While we were sitting by the river doing a reading, he got up and walked down into the woods, the wilder part of the Mississippi River in Minneapolis. She went running after him. He got to the river and she said, “He is so terrified of water. This is unprecedented, that he would just walk through there.” There were little creeks he had to step over.
She told me was that she was going to see her daughter play at a county fair one day. She took the car and parked with Nick on a residential street outside the foregrounds. Nick usually sat in the car and waited. But that day he got out of the car and started walking down the street with great purpose. She got out of the car and started running after him. “Where are you going?” He walked five houses down, and with great intent picked a house, walked up the sidewalk and around to the back of the house, where he went up three steps that had no back on them—and that, too, she said, was something that would just terrify him. He went into the house, which was surprisingly unlocked. She ran after him, mortified, and came into the kitchen of the house. He had gone down the hall, in a room, and shut the door. She was standing there flummoxed. “What can I say to anyone who encounters us?” In a few minutes she heard the toilet flush. He retraced his steps and got back in the car.
My experience with Dorothea is longer than that, but working with them inspired me to write the only screenplay I’ve ever written, Gravity. It’s about a theoretical Nick who can communicate telepathically and begins early, going into the dreams of Rose, who then becomes a famous author and is united with Nick and his mother and they go off on a journey to try to “cure” autism. Autism ends up curing them, as it were. That is my experience with the autism piece of it.
And one last thing, about my mother. My mother, as many of you who have been with me know, has been successfully installed in her home that she bought in 1956 and paid for all by herself, with two amazing caregivers who are now part of our family. She’s very, very happy. She’s lost all memory of anything having to do with anything in her life. She doesn’t remember giving birth, my ex-husband. She remembers her children and her grandchildren. She watches the Game Show Network all day and sleeps a lot. But I’m so very blessed that I can go and share my sadness about Lonnie’s death and see how she’s doing.
The funny thing was, on Mother’s Day, my sister Chris and I were visiting and I said, “Ah, President Donald Trump!” And she said, “Ha ha ha! That will never happen!” We had to break the news to her. She was quite shocked, but of course it doesn’t really matter to her. It never would have anyway.
But enough of me. Joining us is Ken Routson, an author, speaker, consultant, life coach, and workshop facilitator. He’s been nationally recognized for his contributions in developing day programs and residential supports for people with disabilities. Welcome, Ken! Good morning!
0:21:05.1 Ken: Good morning to you and everyone, those visible, those physical and those who are not physical!
Barbara: (laughs) Which is quite a few! You have at your side Leslie Stewart, it’s a little bit of a two-fer today, maybe?
Ken: Yes! In fact, I want to read a couple paragraphs that she wrote about her perspective about Mom, both the “old Mom” and the “new Mom.” [Ken’s mother before and after Alzheimer’s.] This is part of a chapter where she talks about her experience with Mom. I’d like to read the last two paragraphs of her wonderful, inspirational words.
Ken: “This type of shift in mood is why it is so important for care providers to learn how to nurture and redirect anxious and agitated people by establishing rapport and cultivating an interactive atmosphere of trust and unconditional love and acceptance. One of the gifts of Alzheimer’s is the short-term memory. If the person is gently redirected, they will often forget their previous experience or event and come into the moment with their new activity. Mama Fern’s Alzheimer’s taught me that life doesn’t have to be over if we receive a bad diagnosis” That’s with any diagnosis, cancer, Alzheimer’s, anything. That’s me saying that.
Ken: “My new relationship with her afforded me new adventures and splendid simplicity such as not worrying about others’ perceptions, being more spontaneous, and being more alive and full of joy for each and every moment of the day. Also seeing things as if it were the first time, experiencing the excitement you feel upon each and every new discovery and everyday experiences that you might have taken for granted before. Mama Fern would see, feel, and hear things we overlooked. In a bucket of garbage, she would discover delightful things after just picking something up, examining it, and processing it. Just like a compact holder held delight for her as she would try to tear it apart to see how it was made, the most mundane detail for us was a brilliant new discovery for her. It was such a gift, a delight, to be with her and watch her discovering something new each and every moment, sort of like a two-year-old, a three-year-old. They’re so fascinating to watch because they’re so curious. Thank you, Mama Fern, for the gifts of living in the moment, cherishing every moment, and loving life as if it were your first, last, and only.”
0:24:18.5 Barbara: Wow! So Mama Fern was your mother. Having gone through this whole thing with my mother and having to set my mother up and the stiff learning curve that any child goes through when you’re helping your mother who doesn’t have Alzheimer’s, it was stressful. What was it about your mother that started you to wonder if she was suffering from Alzheimer’s? I thought that they can’t really diagnose it as Alzheimer’s, or can they? Am I wrong on that?
Ken: It depends on which neurologist or which doctor you talk to I don’t really think that there’s any one specific MRI or anything that could do that because also, I believe that some people, like Raun Kaufman with autism, his story was depicted in a very popular television show, I think it was in 1979, called “Son-Rise.” He was severely autistic, had many behaviors. The parents took him all over the country to find a school to help him, and every school they found not only their experience with him, but the other people in that school would have worse behaviors after they attended school than before. So they sat down in their own living room. Raun liked to spin plates. They would sit down and spin plates with him; they entered his world.
Ken: Therefore they were able to forge a bond, because they valued him and accepted him unconditionally, established rapport, and he started to slowly enter our world, the world of society. He further was able to heal his autism, and that’s very controversial. But there’s science to back it up, the psychiatrist and psychologist who saw him. He was able to do it, and he’s the director of the Autism Treatment Center of America. But there are people with Alzheimer’s to whom that happens, just like with multiple sclerosis, there are some cases where it’s arrested. I believe that Alzheimer’s itself, after doing research …
0:27:19.6 Ken: To back up a little, when taking care of my mom, I saw a lot of characteristics similar to those in people with autism I’ve worked with for forty-plus years. When I started studying the science of the brain and the science of Alzheimer’s and autism, it’s personal, from all of my analysis and research, it’s only my opinion that most—not all—Alzheimer’s is due to long-term, chronic stress and constant emotional turmoil that floods the body with toxic cortisone and other toxic adrenalin types of neurotransmitters, and that and inflammation burn up the immune system, causing the body to attack itself. My mom had real severe rheumatoid arthritis, where all her fingers and toes started to cross each other and curl up. I think almost all autoimmune disease, whether it’s fibromyalgia, cancer, or whatever, is due to long-term, chronic stress and resistance.
Barbara: That makes a lot of sense to me. As I’ve looked at my mother, who has not only kept her wits about her, which is one archaic way of saying it, but has resisted the mainstream big pharma Western medicine pipeline. Granted, she had some prescription drug addiction, but she wouldn’t just jump and go to the doctor. I often wondered if the fact that my mother was so emotional—she was an adult in the ’40s, ’50s, and ’60s, when a woman was not supposed to be crying all the time, but she did anyway, and she was outspoken. And she had the attitude that life was going to take care of her, and it always did, very well. Even now we laugh that this is exactly what my mother would manifest. I don’t think she had the kind of stress that you’re talking about. Like you said, there’s not a particular MRI that you can take, but had she started forgetting things and a bunch of us had said, “Oh, you must be getting dementia, we’re going to prove you have that and define it as that,” who knows what definitions would have surrounded all that?
0:30:17.4 Ken: Another reason I think a lot of people get Alzheimer’s is that they never got the joy of life. They’ve never enjoyed life. Happiness is a choice, and some people have trouble with that. They see the world as a struggle, as misery. In many cases, Alzheimer’s is God’s or nature’s way of acting as a natural anesthetic. Before, my mom was very much a worrier. She tried to control people’s lives even when we were grown. She was very uptight. She couldn’t sit and look at clouds. After, Leslie and I would take her for rides and she would just look at clouds for 45 minutes and talk about how beautiful they are. She was so much more peaceful. Except for when people were trying to control her, like, when we would take her home or my sister took care of her or she went back to the nursing home or assisted living, she would have behaviors.
Ken: In one nursing home they took away her doll baby. That doll baby was her lifeline. She had refused to take medicine, and the LPN told the CMA to take her doll until she took her medicine—which is abuse. She hadn’t seen me. I was walking down the hall. And I had a fit. She started biting at them. Here’s a lady who never cursed in her life who was calling them names I’d never heard her say before. It was her life whenever she was uptight. But not with Leslie and me, she always was at peace with us, because we allowed her to be herself. We would take her for rides every weekend, and like I said, places she had never seen. One time we took her to a park and she was so appreciative. She said, “Oh, you took me to California!”
Ken: It was a blessing, because she was so much more relaxed when she had Alzheimer’s than she ever was before.
Barbara: Wow! Plus she could go to California!
0:32:44.0 Ken: At first I went through all the stages of loss that Elizabeth Kübler-Ross talks about, the anger, the bargaining. And at the end, I found acceptance, and once I made peace—that’s so important in any diagnosis, especially terminal diagnoses—once you make peace with it, you can see the gifts. When my mom died, I went through the loss of two mothers, the one who was very controlling, a worrier, who was very nervous and uptight, and the last mom who was so child-like, like the beautiful, inspirational passage that Leslie wrote. Life is good if we get out of our own way.
Ken: You had mentioned about synchronicities earlier. Leslie and I are starting to see where almost every 10 minutes we talk about something, and then we turn on the television and they’re talking about it. You pick up a book, and whatever the last question you had was, the answer is there. Life is for us if we get out of our own way.
Barbara: I think there’s an uptick in it. I can’t tell if it’s because I’ve come through something or because we’re all going through it together.
Ken: I think it’s an acceleration of energy, everything. So many people are unconscious. Thanks so much for all your Einsteinian work, because as I talk about in Beliefology, we all have been so unconscious, and just now we’re opening our eyes to the beauty of the world, how life supports us at every turn if we just get out of our own way.
0:34:37.1 Barbara: I don’t want to go into any detail about my sister, but she did that. She got out of her own way and synchronicity brought a series of events that led her exactly to where she needed to go to get to that joy. The question I had asked, for those listening, was that my sister’s son was brutally murdered and of course, what a horrible, horrible thing! How do you bring joy to it?
Barbara: Let’s go to Beliefology. I looked for my copy that I’m sure you signed, but I couldn’t find it, which is fine. I’ve downsized several times since then. But I do remember very clearly writing to you and saying, “Oh, my gosh! This is so Einsteinian!” or however I said it. And then I don’t remember how I got to you again.
Ken: It came out in 1997. Because back in the ’80s, Leslie and I moved from Dayton, Ohio, to Fort Lauderdale. There were many, many people all throughout south Florida hungry for this information. The timing was great. What led me to my inspirational path was, I was born with severe learning disabilities, I had aphasia also. I could not fluently express myself until I was in the fourth grade. Ironically enough, later on, much of my career I was paid well for talking and communicating. Life is so fascinating.
0:36:42.0 Ken: I had a massive inferiority complex and an alcohol addiction. When I was 19 years old, Spirit led me to an institution. I didn’t even know what it was. In fact, I was pretty high the first time I went. It was originally a sanitarium for people with tuberculosis. I walked up and they said, “You must be here to volunteer.” There were children there I never knew existed. I ended up volunteering in there for, like, 70 hours a week. It was like I had a purpose. I let go of the things that weren’t that good influences on me. I stopped drinking. I started to pick up and read every book I could about self-help, about psychology, the power of positive thinking. Suddenly I ran into the Seth material. I’ve always been a curious person, and the Seth material put all those pieces into a cohesive, comprehensive understanding of how we create our reality.
Ken: As I traveled the country doing Seth seminars, many of my students had people, family members, people at work they couldn’t share the Seth material with. The wanted a book that would explain things like what we call love and attraction and how we create our reality. As Seth coined so famously, as Jane Roberts wrote back in the ’60s, “You create your reality, and the point of the power is in the present.” They wanted something that didn’t have all of what regular people thought was “ooga-booga.” So I came out with the book Beliefology: Raise Your Consciousness to Wealth, Health & Happiness! And talk about how your life reflects your beliefs! Change your beliefs, transform your life. Our beliefs are like magnets, just like a garage door opener. People can believe that that little gadget can open the door or the remote can control the TV, but so many people have trouble thinking that you attract everything, 100% of things in your life, according to your beliefs and emotions and ideas.
0:39:14.7 Barbara: I think people often don’t think that at least from our Einstein model here that the universe is flowing out of us, through our bodies, which is the projector and perceptor of the universe.
Ken: Like the television, the radio stations. You have all those electromagnetic data that have to have the TV, just like the computer. We are the terminals or the computers for our inner self. In your introduction, you were so right. Everything physical has a non-physical counterpart. The physical is such a small part of what Seth calls the framework to inner reality.
Barbara: I ate up those Seth books when I was very young, too. I was always impressed by the science end of it. It seemed more scientific to me than it did spiritual.
Ken: For most people, though, it’s too cerebral. Orion and Abraham simplify it. What I’ve heard of your Einstein work is good because it’s a tandem of cerebral and emotional. Just stuff like manifesting money. It’s a currency, a feeling thing. With Seth sometimes it gets too intellectual. So many people get in their way with their intellect and don’t allow those feelings, which is what attracts reality. It was 2007—
Barbara: When your book came out?
Ken: The new edition. It originally came out in 1997. It sold like hotcakes. Oprah did not yet have that Secret that got a lot of people into the law of attraction. The timing on the first edition was great. But many people wanted it, and it was out of print. That’s why in 2007 I decided to do a second edition. Before the Internet and Facebook, I had many letters from people all over the world telling me how Beliefology changed their lives, and how it was so simple. They also liked how I talked about how especially because of the paternalistic, hierarchical God, how in society we have created God in our human image instead of feeling what Father-Mother God is. In Beliefology I go into our beliefs that we’ve been taught about God. It’s very important for us to develop our own personal relationship with the God of our beliefs, the Christ-consciousness that I think is more than just for Christians.
0:42:48.6 Barbara: Yes. In our map Compassion is the fifth fundamental force of the universe. Everything overlaps there as well. So much overlapping in that system. And I can see why people—I often feel the Einstein work is too complex. I want something simpler, which is why we did ConRev 101, very basic, parboiled-down to the basic, basic stuff. It’s the theory of everything, the maps of the entire universe and how matter is manifest. It’s a lot of information. How much don’t we need to get to the average person?
Ken: It surely is. The sciences and data stuff—who wrote the wonderful, beautiful thing, speaking of politics?
Leslie: Lissa Rankin.
Ken: My favorite doctor. Everyone should read Mind Over Medicine: Scientific Proof That You Can Heal Yourself. And the doctor Peter Whitehouse, I’d like to read, if you don’t mind, his endorsement for The Gifts of Autism & Alzheimer’s.
0:44:18.8 Ken: Peter Whitehouse is an M.D., a neurologist, a cognitive scientist, an internationally recognized expert on Alzheimer’s, and this shows how he bravely and courageously takes on the pharmaceutical companies in almost every lecture, no matter what country or what book. I’m sure he’s is not a dear friend of the pharmaceutical companies. This is the endorsement he wrote for my book: “A revolution is underway, and this book is an exciting part of it. Positive human stories are a powerful response to the negative words that our unhealthy medicine and unthinking science try to label us with as our brains and our bodies age. Anecdotes, hidden powerful individual narratives, are the antidote to the poisons of pharmaceutical profits. True hope lies in community and caring, not in the hype and false hope of molecules and money.”
Barbara: Yup! That hits my sweet spot. I am so much a proponent of mind over medicine, and so far, so good. I haven’t been hit with some catastrophic thing, but every time I think, “I should go to the doctor and get some medicine,” then I respond, “No. My spirit will guide me to what I need to do to heal this.” So far, so good.
Ken: Leslie’s title is one of my favorite titles of any book, Leslie’s and the people she translates for, the collective consciousness known as Orion. As that wonderful book says, Trust & Allow the Process of Life In-Joy!
Barbara: And as I found out last month and even stated when we were talking, I was a skeptical person. There’s a part of me that resists the idea that there are times when you cannot be in joy, you just cannot. When you’ve just found out your son was stabbed 31 times on his front steps, you can’t be in joy. But yes, I have to say, after what I’ve seen happen over the past month, you can be so appreciative and excited and in the moment, like you’ve been talking about, the present moment, the miraculous moment when a mysterious force is creating this body and letting me send the universe out and bring it back to perceive it. That alone, regardless of what’s going on, is so miraculous that it changes your relationship to what’s going on. In that way you can bring change to what’s going on if it’s not joyful, or you detach from the physical world as the primary reality and go into the non-physical of eternal, unending energy.
0:47:56.9 Ken: Do you have a play you wrote about your experience with the fellow with autism, Nick?
Barbara: It’s a movie. The parts of it that are how I describe autism in the movie are based on some of my assumptions. For example, there’s a scene in the movie where Rose, who is the woman whose dreams he put himself into as they were growing up, and then they finally met—she’s walking through a forest at twilight and she’s hearing what he hears or would hear if he didn’t have his own way to filter it. Like the bugs eating the bottom of the leaves, the dew turning on the plants. She had supersonic hearing that was him showing her what it feels like to have all of this input with no filters. But it also depicts, as you said, that this is a gift. It’s not something to be cured in that sense, but from what you said about the man who went on to get a hold of himself—
Ken: Raun Kaufman.
Barbara:—it’s not a genetically—of course, I don’t believe that we can’t change genetics, even. If it’s all coming from within us—
Ken: Yes. My current research for my next book is Neuroplasticity and Epigenetics: Let’s Stop Scaring Ourselves to Death. Oh, that epigenetics! For you in the audience, Google “epigenetics” or “Joe Dispenza.” In Change the Habit of Being Yourself, he talks a lot about epigenetics. And Bruce Lipton talks about epigenetics, about how we create the genes, not the other way around, how consciousness presupposes matter. I would love for you to write a book on your experience channeling the autistic young man, expressing some of his feelings and thoughts.
0:50:47.3 Barbara: What was most wonderful for me was, after the sessions we had and having her cry and say, “All this time it’s been him, and now I can go on,” they ended up—she was not living in a good place for them, and she was getting on in years. She ended up moving him to more of a group home setting where she was able to get some relief from her responsibilities as well. It was beautiful. Now I know I can channel living people who happen to be autistic. OK. (laughs)
Ken: It’s was like that with Alzheimer’s, too, because they’re still there. I’m looking forward to you reading, if you would like at some point, I know you’re very busy, in chapter 8 in this book, it’s “Is Anyone In There?” So many doctors and scientists think it’s parts of the brain, like the hippocampus, where your memory is, that the afterlife experience, or when you die and come back, that that is a biological sensation and repercussion. I’d be interested in having your feedback and Einstein’s feedback on that chapter because this is important. This is a part of their spiritual evolutionary growth of Alzheimer’s. In my mom, you could see her explore other realities, and then she would come back to this reality. She wouldn’t know who I was or anybody else, she’d think I was her brother, and she’d always see her father. And the next week all of a sudden she’d be very lucid.
0:53:00.0 Ken: I think Orion said Alzheimer’s is kind of like if you can imagine a DVD with all the tracks, and they just shift from track to track. We took my mom for a ride one time, she took us to the street where she had lived when she first came to Dayton, and over a three-day period she named all those people, she talked about all these people she had known in school when she lived there. She flipped back to that track on that DVD. I don’t know if it was after her death or right before, we found a scrapbook with all those people she had named, they actually existed in the late ’40s.
Ken: And this was a person who did not even recognize us. So all of that’s in there. It’s not gone. Anybody listening to this or listening to or reading the files that I’m sure we’ll share, don’t put your loved one in a nursing home unless you just can’t take care of them, and if you do, go see them! So many people in my research put loved ones in a nursing home and they never saw them again because they said, “They won’t know. I would rather remember them the way they were.” And they miss such a wonderful part of this purposeful process that’s a part of life. So many people discovered what I did, that there is life after the Alzheimer’s diagnosis, not just for the people with Alzheimer’s, but also for the loved ones and the caretakers. There’s a gift there that can also help them in their life to learn mindfulness. That’s the biggest thing that my mom taught Leslie and me: mindfulness. Being in the moment.
Barbara: It’s interesting you bring that up. That was my other experience with Alzheimer’s. It was in 1994 when I was first channeling groups and realizing that I could communicate with people who had passed on. My friend said, “My mother is deep into an Alzheimer’s coma,” whatever they call it, and whoosh! She appeared to me like a dead person. We started talking, and she said things like, “I want my blue blanket.” And my friend said, “Oh, my gosh, she wasn’t allowed to bring her favorite blue electric blanket to the nursing home.” She wanted her hot tub. Like you said, the family had stopped visiting her. She was just a vegetable. It led to a renewed interest in her family coming to see her. They eventually moved her out of that nursing home because they found out they weren’t treating her well, and they got her in a better place.
0:56:29.0 Barbara: That confirmed the idea I have about Alzheimer’s and dementia, like you have said in your book, that it’s a protection, in a way, of aging, but also it’s a way to see other realms. I don’t know about you, but I’m always exploring in the non-physical.
Ken: One of your initial questions was when we first saw signs. When she was in assisted living, Leslie would bring pictures of our vacations, and she would see animals or children that weren’t in the pictures. But then how do we know? And she’d look out the window when we’d go up our drive and she’d say, “Isn’t that a beautiful dress that little girl’s got on?” And Leslie and I started to think, “She is actually tapping into other frequencies, other probable realities that are actually there.” It’s amazing. There’s a chapter I wrote about the extraordinary gifts of autism and Alzheimer’s, about people with autism, savants, like the one guy, he’s an autistic savant like Rain Man, and he would go over Paris or New York in a helicopter, get back to his studio, and draw the skyline exactly, without missing a building or a window.
Barbara: Wow! I’ve been appearing on a radio show, “Mack Maloney’s Military X-Files.” They have all sorts of fascinating stories. We were talking about remote viewing. Psychics have a specialty, what they do naturally. For whatever reason, my psychic gifts were married to Einstein, which is great. I don’t think I could do that kind of accurate remote viewing, but that’s what he’s doing. He could go to work for the military.
Ken: Leslie wrote me a note here that I should mention about the time in the hospital when she looked out the window and she said, “Oh, there’s Russia!” and she started to name cities and places in Russia that I don’t think she knew physically in her non-Alzheimer body and brain. The human mind is amazing. We scientists and metaphysicians like ourselves haven’t scratched the surface of the mind-body-spirit connection.
Barbara: And we are just barely understanding the structure of how matter is manifest. I personally happen to think that this body of work I’ve done for Einstein is pretty complete, but even with E=mc squared, it took decades before people would recognize what Einstein had done. I was telling the story on that radio show about the time in 1983 when I was living in kind of a haunted house on Madeline Island. The owner had left and asked me not to let anybody come and party in the house. I woke up in the middle of the night to a big party. I was going to tell everyone to leave, and as I opened the door from my bedroom to go downstairs, there was no one there. This happened three times, until I just willed myself to go to sleep amidst the party.
1:00:22.4 Barbara: Then in 1994 I was married in that house. I had an abreaction the night of my wedding, of listening in the same room I had been in to the party and going back to 1983. That opens up questions about, like you’re saying, the amazing body-mind-spirit connection and also, how is it that there’s a wormhole through time where I can hear 1994?
Barbara: And I don’t know what the answer is, but that’s what I believe happened.
Ken: Seth talks about the multi-dimensional reality we all live in, how all time is simultaneous. I love stories like you just told. They’re fascinating and thought-provoking.
Barbara: I want you to talk once again about your new book.
Ken:Neuroplasticity and Epigenetics. Neuroplasticity is how we can rewire our brain and our whole neurological physical biology. Epigenetics is about how we turn on some genes and turn off some genes by our beliefs and our lifestyle. That’s why there are families where many people are very severely diabetic, but one or two aren’t, and that is because of their lifestyle, their belief system, their emotional demeanor. Attitude is everything. They turn off those propensities of genes and chromosomes that have a probability of leading to becoming diabetic and affecting your pancreas. It’s so much about your beliefs. That’s why Bruce Lipton, who wrote The Biology of Belief, talks about epigenetics. The rest of the title is Let’s Stop Scaring Ourselves to Death.
Barbara: (laughs) I love that!
Ken: Because we do such damage, including me. I picked up a lot of the worry characteristics from my mom. Orion talks about learning how to change our habitual responses, our habitual emotional responses, how to get in touch with that. And Joe Dispenza, with the wonderful title of his book, Changing The Habit of Being Yourself, because we’re habitual creatures. That is the toughest job, the essential prerequisites to being a deliberate creator, creating the life of your choice, or allowing it. It happens when you get into a partnership between your physical ego self and enhance that partnership with your inner oversoul self.
Barbara: Yup. We call it aligning to Compassion, where the whole system is operating just as it was designed to do, where Emotions are flowing, and as they flow, they bring the voice of Intuition, which is the voice of Compassion, and they hit the Intellect and they get defined in some way. That I think is the place where we start to redefine. We’ve been taught to define Emotion in such a way that people limit it and suppress it, which is part of inflammation and illness. But when we can start to marry even the worst-appearing emotions of anger or sadness to a deep, regenerative definition, this is the beautiful, passionate part of you! Let it flow! Take a breath!
Ken: Energy emotion, the energy in motion, and where the mind goes, energy flows.
Barbara: Our time is up. Thank you so much, Ken and Leslie!
Ken: Oh, absolutely! Thank you for all of your work. Your work with autism has totally fascinated me. I’ll want more. You haven’t quenched my thirst yet.
Barbara: (laughs) OK. I’ll pull out my treatment for the screenplay and send it to you. I had thought this morning that we would do a channel, but I’ll forgo that for right now. Thank you, everyone, for coming. Next month I have an open slot. I don’t know who will be with us, but hopefully it’ll be someone at least half as fascinating as Ken and Leslie have been! Thank you so much.
Ken Routson is an author, speaker, consultant, life coach, workshop facilitator and is nationally recognized for his contributions in developing day programs and residential supports for people with disabilities, as well as for his popular sensitivity-training workshops for schools and social service agencies.
While taking care of his mother with Alzheimer’s, Ken noticed in her characteristics and behaviors like people with autism. Ken was very familiar with autism, as he has worked in the field of disabilities for over 35 years. Ken asked Nancy Reder, a retired registered nurse also from Dayton, to co-author the book, The Gifts of Autism and Alzheimer’s, a compilation of insights, observations, and inspiring personal stories by and about individuals with autism and Alzheimer’s.
After accepting the loss of his “original mother,” Ken fostered a different relationship with his “new mother.” The experience of caring for a parent with Alzheimer’s took him on a fascinating adventure exploring the gifts of autism and Alzheimer’s and inspired him to write the book.
Join us for an in-depth discussion about autism, Alzheimer’s and a new way to approach these difficult conditions.
Group will end with a channel from Einstein and the Party.
Good morning. It is Sunday, April 23rd, 2017. I am Barbara With. We are here with the Party. Partyof12.com is where you can find all things Einsteinian from beyond the grave, news from the Party of 12, and of course information about Conflict REVOLUTION, our imagined Einstein’s miraculous process for world peace, one person at a time, starting with you—or me. I’ll start with me, and you can start with you.
Today we are broadcasting from Denver, Colorado. I have several things I want to talk about before we get to our special guest today, my friend Leslie Stewart, a psychic channel and author of Trust and Allow the Process of Life, In-Joy! This is a book of knowledge that she has published from her talks with Orion, her collective voice of guidance. We’ll hear how she became a channel, and then I want to access her thoughts on some ideas about joy. I named this “The Politics of Joy,” because I myself am often a skeptic. When I get in my worst conditions, I am skeptical about joy, especially in these increasingly dangerous times. I think we can shed some light on how we can move through for our highest good.
I’ll also update about last month’s show. We had some very interesting revs, and I particularly have been having a wild ride through one that I named “Miscommunications and Assumptions.” As I predicted at the time, this revolution is going to be with me for a very long time. It’s quite similar to the revolution I had in 2002, where my sound bite was, “She is a liar,” which turned into “I am a liar,” which turned into sort of a mantra. We can so easily lie to ourselves, and we can so easily believe those lies. “Miscommunications and Assumptions” has already changed my life, and I’ll share about how I am making different decisions and how it is leading to very compassionate outcomes.
Earlier this week, Debbie sent me a link to a video of some old footage of Albert Einstein. It was so wonderful to see that video. (It’s posted on Partyof12.com.) We’ll listen to it, because I want you all to hear his voice. I don’t know what year they were recorded, but I encourage you to watch that video. I don’t know why it affected me, it’s not like I haven’t been channeling Einstein all these years, and I love Einstein, but when she sent that to me, what struck me so was his voice. The message is also important, but this is his voice:
“We should strive not to use violence in fighting for our cause, but by non-participation in anything we believe is evil. We are concerned not merely with the technical problem of securing and maintaining peace, but also with the important tasks of education and enlightenment. Without such freedom, there would have been no Shakespeare, no Goethe, no Newton, no Faraday, no Pasteur, and no Lister. [Science has provided the possibility of liberation for human beings from hard labor.] When the ideas of humanity are war and conquest, those tools become as dangerous as a razor in the hands of a child of three. We must not condemn man’s inventiveness and patient conquest of the forces of nature because they are being used wrongly. The fate of humanity is entirely dependent upon its moral development.”
“The fate of humanity is entirely dependent upon its moral development.” I brought this forward today first of all because when I started channeling in 1987, the voice that came through me had a very heavy, very particular, peculiar accent. Try as I would, I could never duplicate it when I wasn’t channeling. In 1994, after hearing a woman on television speak with the same accent, I found out that she was [speaking in] Yiddish. So OK, there’s one more reveal of Einstein. But that was several years before he stepped out and identified himself, in 1998.
So hearing this voice the other day was like that old voice. Since then, all of you who have been listening to me channel will agree that the voice has changed, it’s very much a collective of different voices. My voice is sometimes stronger; it’s not quite the same. But I got nostalgic when I heard that. And more importantly, listening to his voice from the past and hearing the things he said back then gave me chills, because these ideas we are working with here with our imagined Einstein are certainly a continuation of his words in life, his mission in life. That video brought home that he’s still a visionary. The last time I had a book signing here in Denver, a young woman, perhaps 20, came up, and said, “I love Albert Einstein!” He is enduring through the ages. Yesterday someone said, “I heard that video on Facebook.” So he’s getting around on his own, and I’m happy, because there’s so much that we can bring forward to help with the fate of humanity and its moral development.
Before I get into talking about “Miscommunications and Assumptions,” I want to let you know that I have been sneaking off and being on the radio. I found a blog that allowed me to apply, so to speak, to be a guest on radio shows. It was quite an extensive application. They sent it out to the nine categories that I picked, and I immediately began to get invitations to be on radio shows. I have done three or four; some have aired, some have not. I’ll get my website up to date. The one that is the most curious that I want us as our little group to follow specifically is Mack Maloney’s Military X-Files. It’s not just Mack Maloney but also his two co-hosts Juan-Juan and Commander Cobra. They broadcast on military networks online. They just picked up the Inception Radio Network in the UK that reaches about half a million people—a big reach.
These guys are hilarious. Mack is a published author, with many futuristic science fiction-fantasy books about saving the world. He also has a book entitled UFOs During Wartime, which I downloaded and have been reading. I’m fascinated by the research that has been done on sightings of UFOs during wartime and why they come at wartime. (I’ll post links.) I’ve been binge-listening to get up to date, because they’ve asked me to be a regular guest on the show. I’ve been on twice so far. One of the things they’ve been talking about is that Juan-Juan and Commander Cobra apparently have some conflict, and they need some help. So I’m looking forward to seeing what can be done when I next am on the show about exploring their conflict. I secretly think their conflict is quite dramatic, for the radio, but it’s interesting to have a triad of men.
And they talk like girls. They do. Now, they’re all men, and they’re military guys, so they don’t want their identities to be revealed because they are still in the military. I am in a small quandary about ending up—I know it’s no accident that I ended up here, but here we are with the war makers. They’re lovely, wonderful people. But they are the ones who pull the triggers. So that will be an interesting conversation for the future as we move forward.
I want to give you an update about “Miscommunications and Assumptions.” If you remember, I had had a conflict—and it doesn’t even matter what all the details are—where my sound bite was, “She is not communicating well, and she is making assumptions.” So of course I revolved that around to “I make assumptions,” and I immediately set to work to see where I make assumptions. It was a daunting observation because the world is based on assumptions. Once I started watching myself, I learned two very important things: I make assumptions all of the time, and mostly they’re wrong.
I had my conflict and got my revolution and started watching in Charleston, and then I went to New Orleans to meet one of my dearest friends, an integrity activist. She’s just lovely. I know she sometimes gets a little dramatic, so I thought, “I’ll go to New Orleans, I’ll get my own room.” We met the first night, and it was wonderful. We hadn’t seen each other in several years. We went on the ghost tour. She’s a ghost tour operator. We planned our next day. Her boyfriend had to go in the hospital and get some day surgery, but after that she was going to take me to a graveyard.
I texted her in the morning, and I never heard back. She never returned any of my texts. I had decided that, well, you never know. My mind started to say, “Maybe she’s codependent. Maybe she’s avoiding me”—all assumptions. I decided that this was important enough to be some kind of demonstration that I was not going to make assumptions. I had a beautiful day. I had to get up early the next day to go to the airport. And I never heard from her. She never answered any of my texts.
I got to Corpus, and I thought, “I’ll try her on Facebook.” She told me she had called me and texted me several times and was so sorry we couldn’t connect. This began a very intense observation process of me not making assumptions, because clearly there were no calls on my phone.
I opened myself up to the universe and said, “Show me what’s really going on. I’m not going to assume one thing.” And as I went about my day, in a typical ConRev fashion, where we ask to universe to show us, I started to get images. One was of her and me standing in the street in New Orleans and me showing her a text I had texted to her last summer when her phone was stolen that said, “Do you know whose phone you stole? We’re a bunch of witches! We’re going to cast spells!”
In the discovery process, it came to me: did I block her? Her phone had been stolen, and I had just written that text. Sure enough, I had had her blocked since August! That was a huge hit on my part of all the assumptions I had made for six months about my friend who never calls me back, who never texts me, does she not like me any more? The next part was that I was having trouble getting hold of my friend in Charleston with whom I’d had the conflict with the original sound bite about assumptions. I had called her, left a message, I wanted to highlight her on the show, and I never heard back from her. She finally emailed me and said, “My friend never got her reading link.” I said, “I’ve been calling her.” I gave her the number I called, and there was her voice, but it was a different number. It was confusing.
I assumed—I assumed!—that I had been hacked. I scrubbed my phone, and when I restored it, there were six months of messages from my friend in New Orleans. Six months! Text, messages! Every month, October, November, December. I was at Standing Rock. She was calling. I never returned her calls. What must she have assumed?
The moral of the story is to really pay attention to the assumptions we make. When we go into thinking, “I’m not going to have any assumptions, I’m just going to let the universe show me what the answer is before I confirm it,” you know when the truth is there. There was the truth. I had blocked her for months! A very powerful rev that will be with me forever. Now I say, “I’m pretty sure that—” “Oh! Am I making an assumption?” And it’s really changing my life. It’s changing how I respond to people. You know how you get when you assume that someone doesn’t like you, you get a little edgy? It’s reducing all of that and making my relationships and working through other conflicts I have much easier. It’s so much easier to get to the outcome that’s for the good of all.
So be careful what you assume!
To introduce Leslie, I want to tell you one more story.
I heard it on This American Life, called “In Defense of Ignorance.” If you know This American Life, you know that they take a topic and expand upon it in three or four acts with different substories. The substory was that the reporter, Lulu Wang, of Chinese descent, had found out that her 80-year-old grandmother, who lives in China, was diagnosed with stage four lung cancer. Apparently she only had three months to live. Lulu’s great-aunt, who lived below her grandmother and took care of her, made the decision not to tell Grandma the diagnosis. Lula was very upset with this. She felt like this was deception and that people should know and should be told so that they could get their affairs in order. But the great-aunt was very clear. “We are not telling her.” No one in the family was allowed to tell her.
They decided to hold a party for the whole huge extended family, to come to China and see Grandma Neenee for the last time. Neeneee’s first-born son had just gotten married in Japan. He had been planning to come to China in a year and have a big party to celebrate his marriage, so he moved that up a year. That was the excuse that they were giving for keeping this from Neenee. And not just keeping it, but the whole family’s coming, and they have to pretend that she doesn’t have only three months to live and that this is really a happy party to celebrate her son’s marriage.
Lulu flies over to the party. (You can listen to the whole episode.( It’s truly fascinating how the family dealt with having to be at this party pretending to be happy looking at Mom or Grandma and knowing she was going to pass away in just a few months.
The long and the short of it was, the Chinese have a belief called “chongxi,” meaning “to rinse out joy,” the belief that you can wash away pain and suffering with joy. During the course of this trip, Lulu discovers that Neenee had had a mastectomy and had been wearing a prosthetic breast, and she never told anybody, because she didn’t want to burden them with the worry. That was the whole idea behind the lie they were telling her: that they weren’t going to burden her, especially if she was sick, with the worry. If it was to happen, it would. To give away the end of the story, Neenee’s still alive, three years later. Apparently at her last checkup, she got the same diagnosis, and her sister, Lulu’s great-aunt, decided to tell her that had she lost the findings, but they were the same as last time.
I’m glad we have a doctor in the audience, because my philosophy has always been that if you don’t tell me that I’m sick and then define what will happen, I have a better chance of manifesting a different outcome. Hearing this story was enlightening. It was all about the idea of “chongxi,” that joy can wash away misfortune.
This is probably a good time to introduce my friend Leslie Stewart, who is in Ohio today. We’ll talk about her book, which I had the honor of helping her with. Good morning, Leslie! Welcome to our show!
Leslie: Good morning, Barbara, how are you?
Barbara: I’m excellent.
Leslie: I love the story you just spoke of. In many ways, that’s how I’ve lived my life, through what some people would say is ignoring diagnosis, ignoring the outcome of something that could be tragic. I reframe it, put it in my framework where I believe that what is best for myself is looking at things in a positive manner. If someone gives me a diagnosis of something, I process it and I let it go through me, and then I say, “But this doesn’t have to own me.” I’m putting ownership and responsibility on myself as to how I see myself processing all of it.
Barbara: That is so insightful. I have to say that when I was working on your book with you, I was getting a little frustrated because I’ve been working on conflict, and it’s almost the opposite, where when you have to go into a conflict you don’t want to be ignorant of certain things. But from what I see in your writing and from listening to your channeling from the website and reading your Facebook posts, you are always very positive. Orion always seems to be in joy. I’m so enamored of that.
0:22:38.1 Leslie: Yes. Orion teaches that above and beyond all else, always be true to yourself. If you’re being true to yourself, no matter what that is, whatever is true for you, make that your M.O. If I’m being true to myself and being positive is being true to myself, then so be it. If you’re one who is involved with other things outside of self, whether it be politics, medicine, whatever it is, being true to yourself in that realm of your experience is what’s important. And it doesn’t matter to me or to anyone else how you deal with it as long as you feel that it is coming from your heart space, from who you believe to be you. That is the message that Orion’s always giving out. Be true to yourself. However you come into that, own it and be it.
Barbara: That would answer the next question I had! (laughs) You must be psychic! Lately, I would say since we’ve been doing this Re-boot, I have experienced more real joy than I’ve had maybe ever. There are some days when I am so happy, it’s like I’m ADHD with happiness. It’s not because of an external circumstance, because there certainly still are all the external circumstances that are threatening the world that Einstein is concerned about. But like you said, it comes because I am being true to myself. I didn’t frame it that way, but it was about being so darn happy because I am true to myself. I live a life in which I strive to be. It changes your relationship to everything, good or bad, that’s happening outside of you.
Leslie: It really does. Oftentimes I can find myself getting caught up in what’s happening on the outside. Then I have to bring myself back into that space and ask, “What do I want here? I am reacting to something outside of myself. How will I deal with this?” I can either get into being wrapped up and caught up in all of that negativity outside of myself, or I can bring myself back into that space where I believe I can find the truth within me, the truth of reconnection, however I want to reconnect, to that which gives me joy.
0:26:17.8 Leslie: Oftentimes I’ll find myself reconnecting with nature, because nature always brings me back into a space of joy, whether it be taking a beautiful walk and enjoying the beautiful blooms and the trees and the flowers, listening to water lap up against a shore—whatever it is that can bring me back into that place where I can find peace and joy. That’s where I go. Then I cannot allow all of the stuff going on outside of myself to interfere with that joyful place. Sometimes it does take practice to get there.
Barbara: How would you define “joy”?
Leslie: Being at peace with wherever you are and whatever gets you that joy, whatever gives you happiness, whatever gives you that peace or tranquility. It’s an individual thing. Everyone has their own concept and belief about what joy is. For me, it’s a place where I find complete and utter elation, ecstasy, bliss. That’s what it is for me.
Barbara: Do you ever experience what I would metaphorically call “survivor’s guilt”? Not you personally as much as the question I have about being joyful. In the activist community, in which I was very, very engaged for several years, we had a saying. We were running ourselves ragged, making ourselves sick, trying to fight the rise of fascism within our government. It was exhausting and depleting and depressing. None of us got much sleep. The saying was, “Sleep is for those with rights.” I am still a bit conflicted. I have not found a place completely where I can say, “Oh, yes, I’m so happy to be finding my bliss,” as I know that other people are suffering.
0:28:58.9 Leslie: I understand what you’re talking about, because I am very empathetic as well as far as what’s going on in the world, all the things that most people call injustices. But the more that you find that you’re pushing against something, the more you’re saying, “This is not right, I have to fight,” it’ll just make it bigger and bigger rather than stepping away from it and saying, “It’s going to work out. It really is going to unfold.” Those who are interested in the fight, in bringing justice to the forefront, and I do applaud those who are doing what they believe is being true to themselves, for myself, I find that if I’m pushing against something, it puts you into a place where you’re not feeling very good about you or anything around you or what’s going on in the world. It all seems to unfair.
Leslie: How do I, a person living here on the planet who sees all this going on, accept that I don’t have to be a part of that which is fighting, but I can be the one who is being peace, living peace, trusting that if I live and breathe and know in my heart of hearts that if I feel that peace is the answer, if joy is the answer, if being happy, being full of all of those things that I know are at the core of each and every person on the planet, that if I can see that every person really is wanting to be in touch with that place of joy, with that place of peace, however they can come to terms with that and feel it and know that it is truly at the core of their being, that how ever they want to participate with life, it is their choice?
0:31:35.3 Leslie: For me, when I find myself getting caught up in any sort of politics or anything that I believe is an injustice, it depletes my energy and makes me feel alone and lost and angry. Those are things that I don’t want to allow into my being because I want to feel alive and happy. If I’m doing that, if I’m being true to myself, I have to reframe those things that I feel are injustices and know that in each individual at the core of the self, there is indeed that place of peace. So I have to say to myself, “To be peaceful I must live peace. To be joyful, I must live joy.” And so on.
Barbara: So you’re saying that it’s almost our duty—again metaphorically—if we want to influence the rest of the world, saying, the bombing in Syria, which was heartbreaking, and bombing anywhere breaks my heart, even though I have high metaphysical ideals, it’s hard for me to think, “Those people are choosing to have their children killed by chemical weapons.” But like you said, the bigger challenge of what my belief system is on a bigger scale means that it’s almost my duty to be that peace, to hold that peaceful space, to not buy into as horrible as I’m sure that experience is so that they can maybe have a chance that supports them spiritually or energetically much more than if I get into the fray and I’m judging. It doesn’t mean I can’t feel their pain or have empathy for them, but it’s much more powerful if we can stay in our peace and in our joy and hold that space and make our energetic space that way. That makes sense to me.
0:34:07.1 Barbara: I have a question I’m asking for my sister who isn’t here and didn’t ask me to ask it, but I wonder about—she lost her only son and only child to a brutal murder. I have been with her helping and we’ve been talking to him from beyond the grave and she’s been rebuilding her life. That was in 2012, so it’s been five years. Through that time she has questioned, “How do you find joy and happiness and meaning in life when something so terribly tragic takes place?”
Leslie: Indeed. And she through you she already knows that he is with her and he is now being more at peace than what he was when he was living on the earth plane. He is now more being peace and enjoying peace. There was a part of him that had a lot of confusion with life. He was a happy-go-lucky guy, but there was still some confusion as to how he wanted to participate in changing the world, changing his own reality. To change his reality, he did change it in a drastic way, and it brought a lot of attention to his being. In bringing that attention to who he is and who he continues to be now is much different than where he was before. Now he is a pioneer in a way of how he brought about lots of change within the whole family dynamic, people talking more, having open conversation about people being murdered, about the crimes.
0:36:31.8 Leslie: It brought a lot of attention also in a positive way where people can see that even through his experience of bring that attention and that spotlight on how he lived his life, it is indeed changing people along his path, even still, even now. There is lots more openness and communication than there was before. He is bringing lots of wonderful things to the forefront through that experience.
Barbara: It’s very, very true. Our entire family dynamic changed greatly to be much more loving and compassionate—not that we still don’t, we four sisters, have our squabbles. She has changed and is still changing. Again, it seems to get back to, it challenges our belief system of life, which is maybe why she was telling me a while back that she’s searching for the meaning of life. I kept thinking, isn’t it what we make it? Isn’t it what—we get to decide what our life means, so that’s very true. I’m excited about moving forward with hopefully more healing.
Barbara: In your book, you cover a lot of different topics. Tell us how you came to be a psychic channel.
Leslie: I remember at a very early age having very extreme dreams. Oftentimes I would wake up and wonder, “Who were the people in that dream? Why was it so intense? How does it affect who I am right now?” That started me on this search of reincarnation and Ruth Montgomery and Edgar Cayce. It snowballed from there. It opened up many doors and many things that felt that they were true to me. As I was doing my self-discovery work, I was sitting in a beautiful little hotel in Cocoa Beach, Florida, near the Cape, and Ken, my spiritual partner, and I were reading Ask and It Is Given by Esther Hicks. She translates for Abraham. Ken asked me, “What would you like to do? What is it you see yourself doing?” I said, “I really would enjoy getting this message out to more people, by allowing myself to translate for a collective consciousness.”
Leslie: Being near the Cape, I launched my own rocket of desire that day, in 2005. I started meditating and journaling more frequently. I got automatic writing, and in that writing, as we all know, we need labels for things, so I asked them, “Who am I speaking to?” They said to me, “We are Orion.” I really didn’t know anything about Orion except that it was a beautiful constellation and I always enjoyed looking at the constellations as a young child. They said they were Orion. Over time, I felt such peace. When they’re with me, as they are right now, they are always giving me love and peace. Whenever anyone has any sort of reading or a session with Orion, when they walk away, they always say, “They exude love and peace.” That, I think, is a part of who Leslie is, and Leslie and Orion are interconnected, of course, as everyone is interconnected with their soul selves.
0:41:33.5 Leslie: Everyone has the potential to connect and have that intuitive ability. It’s just a matter of paying attention, listening to your inner guidance, that intuition that is always with you. A lot of times we just poo-poo it. We say, “I’m not sure why I’m thinking this or why I should do this, but what the hell? I’m just going to do it.” I go with it. That’s paying attention. Oftentimes you’ll find yourself synchronized with things that you are thinking about and want an answer to, and suddenly it seemingly just appears, but it’s you being guided by your own intuition. I think everyone has that potential and the ability to do that.
Barbara: Do you find your channeling to be more seamless consciousness than trance channel? I feel like they’ve been talking through you all morning.
Leslie: They have, yes.
Barbara: (laughs) Not to call them out on their shenanigans, but there they are. As you were describing them, I’m seeing a circle of souls gathered around, and I literally saw stars in a circle, as if the heavens had come down to create this circle with stars and that love emanating from it. It’s a very peaceful, loving, supportive energy that you bring.
0:43:33.9 Barbara: Because you’ve been channeling in giving us these answers, could we ask Orion—the question I’d like to ask is, of course, global. You may have answered it. When Einstein was on his deathbed, he and Bertrand Russell were working on their last manifesto. It was all about a plea for nations to find new ways to resolve their conflicts other than fighting. I believe this work of mine, of ours, has sprung from that. As I look at days going by and North Korea threatening with thermonuclear war and crazy Donald Trump—and believe me, I don’t blame him, because this is a system of war that has been ingrained probably since this civilization has come forward—as we look forward, can they give us some advice about how to approach these very real possibilities?
Leslie: It is a difficult situation for most people to get a handle on how we can deal with all of the warmongering that is going on throughout the planet. How do I as an individual become more inner-directed and stay in a place where I believe that I live in a safe universe? If I’m believing that I’m living in a safe universe, that in my reality, in my realm of understanding of my reality, how do I express and live in a place where I can continue to live in peace and joy and harmony? That again comes down to living it, being it, trusting that as I live my life with those beliefs, if I can live the life of peace and harmony and continue with spreading that to each individual at a time, whether it be just being in a store, smiling at someone, having a short conversation with someone, that person then goes to another person, they’re in a better place, feeling a little bit better about themselves, feeling a little kick in their heart, feeling that, “Life isn’t so bad. Life isn’t horrible.” That continues to snowball like the ripples in a pond. As you throw a stone into the pond, the ripples continue to grow and expand. So do love, joy, happiness. It has to start with each individual.
0:47:01.2 Leslie: If I’m going to live my life that way, I must believe that me being here on the planet at this time must mean something. If that means something to me, what do I want it to mean to me? What we want to share with everyone is that it starts with the individual. As it starts with the individual, it continues to grow and expand. It influences the world as a whole. The more of you who are with this teaching, with this belief that I as a human being on the planet right now, living my life, how do I want to live it? How do I want to express myself as this being right now?
Leslie: Being here, right now, all of you listening in as well, how do you want to express yourselves? How do you want to live your life? In fear? In a place where you’re allowing outside circumstances to interfere with your peace of mind? You can do that, if that gets you what makes you feel good. But we believe that there are more of you out there who want to see the world as coming together as a world that believes in diversity, that believes that there is indeed a powerful place where we can all join our hands and circle around and know that as we continue to grow and expand with our love and the acceptance of all, it does indeed conquer those things that feel like they are invading our peace.
Leslie: So rather than pushing and fighting, we see that it’s our expression and our wanting for all of you to be the best that you can be and to allow yourselves to continue with expressing and enjoying one another and enjoying each and every individual as an individual and knowing that in that individuality there are differences, and that is what makes the world go around. It’s all of everyone being an individual and allowing them to have their individuality and to not fight and to not argue, but to be understanding and really wanting to understand how other individuals see their lives, and to allow them to live it the way they want to. It doesn’t mean it has to interfere with the well-being of yourself.
0:50:23.1 Barbara: As you were talking, Orion, much like my nephew’s murder, I would not wish that kind of suffering on any human. I would not wish the suffering of North Korea dropping an atomic bomb on anyone. However, because it did happen, because he was murdered, as you so accurately described, love came from it. We could be—and I don’t speak for my sister, but anyone in that situation could be very resentful for the rest of one’s life for having your child taken from you. Is it possible that that’s similar to the macrocosm of all of these terrifying threats and possibilities that are pushing us more into understanding how important it is to love one another?
Leslie: Yes, indeed. That is why it is happening right now on the planet: for everyone to get that there are differences and there are many things that are going on outside of yourself that seem to be troubling and disturbing. But it doesn’t have to interfere with my own well-being. How do I continue with loving and living life when all of this destruction and war and hatred go on outside of myself? That is, again, bringing yourself back into, “What do I want? How do I want to see my reality? What is my pool looking like, my ripples of my life? How are they spreading out? What do I see those ripples? Where do I see those ripples going?” As you see the ripples of your life spreading forward, how do you want that to be? Love, self-acceptance, nurturing of self. There are so many people who are in need of nurturing, of self-nurturing, self-love, and nurturing each other. It is something that has been missing from quite some time in many people’s lives. Now more than ever, it’s important for you all to be more understanding and more nurturing and loving.
0:53:22.5 Barbara: Yes. I’m getting inspired by this conversation, because having been through deep activism and giving up my life for this resistance of a cause and then stepping back into this new service, for me, not that my channeling or my work is new, but I realized that what we’re doing, you and I and all of us who are practicing Conflict REVOLUTION and Cassandra bringing these ideas into her practice as a doctor and Debbie bringing them to the children, that these ripples you’re talking about extend very far. I thank you for those answers, because it reaffirms and says in a new way to me that we can only do so much in a day. I don’t mean to limit our energy, but it’s true. I can’t stop what happens in North Korea by going directly at it. I couldn’t stop what was happening in the Wisconsin legislature by going directly at it. Once I backed off and started to do all those things that you were talking about—self-nurturing, self-love, detaching from the struggle—then things started to manifest differently, in individuals coming together, not institutions.
Barbara: So while we couldn’t, for example, stop the mining bill, we could inspire thousands and thousands of people who live in our area to start to stand up and voice and make a difference and stand up for the water. It was quite a learning experience. I’m very grateful for you coming this morning and sharing your talents and your gifts and this information. I’m jazzed now to get out in the day! I’m going to go to the grocery store and be nice to people! (laughs) It sounds so silly, but it’s so fulfilling, to be kind and gentle.
Leslie: And thank you so much. It’s been a pleasure to be with you. We look forward to meeting up with you in the grocery store today.
Barbara: (laughs) And I’m excited, because I’ve asked your spiritual partner Ken to come on next month and talk about the blessings of autism and Alzheimer’s, the gifts, his book, and explore how your work and mine interface with people who are dealing with these kinds of amazing conditions in their physical bodies. But before we go, hold on, I see Debbie has a question.
Debbie: I don’t have a question, I just wanted to reiterate how inspirational and freeing you’ve been. Thank you for sharing your message so beautifully of being peace, being what we want to see outside of ourselves. That’s a huge message for us to have in our hearts. I want to thank you. And thank you, Barbara, you, too, are always an inspiration.
Barbara: Oh, thank you, Debbie, you, too! Debbie has worked very hard on Conflict REVOLUTION and was in fact a coach to me through some of my hardest times. I’m always grateful to see you here. Everyone else, thank you so much. We will be posting this on the website within the week and sharing it with you. So please have a nice day. And all you’ll have to do is watch and be amazed. Namaste.
Join us as we welcome author and psychic Leslie Stewart, who channels the collective known as Orion. We will be talking about her book, Trust and Allow the Process of Life, In-Joy and exploring the nature of joy, free will, and how to get out of the way and trust the flow.
Orion is a non-physical collective consciousness that speaks through Leslie. Instead of focusing on predictions, Orion instructs us on how we can create the life of our choice. Although Orion can provide us with future probabilities, they also give us insight on how our current beliefs and feelings have attracted past events.
And more importantly, Orion provides us with tools and inspiration that enable clients to transform their consciousness. By assisting us in understanding the law of attraction, they help us to raise our vibration—thus allowing us to attract more favorable events and experiences into our lives. Their tutelage can help to enhance our awareness and growth, and assist us in understanding the multidimensional beings that we are and reclaiming our authentic power.
Barbara: Good morning. It’s Sunday, March 26, 2017. I am Barbara With. You are here with me and the Party of 12. Partyof12.com is where you can find all things Einsteinian from beyond the grave, news from the Party of 12, and of course information about Conflict REVOLUTION, our imagined Einstein’s miraculous process for world peace, one person at a time, starting with you—or me. I’ll start with me, you start with you.
My mission this year with my 12-part 2017 Re-Boot Series is to visit places where Einstein’s path, that we’ve channeled and researched and experimented with for the past decades, crosses paths with other knowledge and other bodies of knowledge. To that end, I was prepared to have a wonderful woman on the show today, Leslie Stewart, an author and a channel who wrote a book entitled Trust and Allow the Process of Life In-Joy! I was looking forward to doing today’s show on joy.
But something came up that prompted me to move her appearance to the April show. I did a few coaching sessions and had a conflict of my own that inspired me to devote this today’s show to presenting Conflict REVOLUTION 101, the most basic way to teach Conflict REVOLUTION, step-by-step instructions aimed at absolute beginners—people who have never heard this information before. Even though I have geared it for beginners, this will also help out the rest of us who have been doing this process ad infinitum, some of us literally for decades. It will help us to remember the power of being a perpetual beginner. Sometimes when we’re lost in overwhelming, uncomfortable feelings and our thoughts are out of control, one way to make the shift back into control of your own domain and to start the revolution is to go back to square one, to start at the beginning, review what you know, and take baby steps as if you’re a beginner.
My challenge with this is that the unified field theory and the maps of human consciousness that I have presented over these past decades represent an enormously complex system. It works sequentially. Describing how matter is made manifest one step at a time from nothing into everything is a very big undertaking. I’m so close to it that I don’t trust myself to know what’s necessary and what’s not, because I’ll always go deep. It’s my nature. It all seems necessary to me.
I called up two of my certified coaches, Cathy Kline in Columbus, Ohio, and Robin Cordova, on Bainbridge Island in Washington state, to help me craft a simple vision. They’ll be joining us in a while to share some of their own Conflict REVOLUTION stories. I asked them each two things. First: “What is the simplest way to explain Conflict REVOLUTION? What are the bare, minimal elements of the whole huge unified field theory and the maps of human consciousness that are needed in order to show someone how to do it effectively?” Second: “How do we as trainers inspire you who are learning it, when you are in those moments and the bad emotions are surging and your thoughts are out of control, to take a different step and make a different decision that will move you toward your revolution?” Because those moments of overwhelming emotion and out-of-control thoughts are the place where we do the work of Conflict REVOLUTION.
ConRev is all about catching yourself in the act of making a decision that is not good for you. It’s about doing something different in that moment. When we change our energy that deeply, we are helping to change the way our entire system operates. The more we make conscious decisions in those moments, the more we’re working for the good of the whole, first of all for us and then for the entire situation. Each time it becomes easier in those conflicted moments to not only decide to make a different choice to do something else, but then to do it. That’s what it’s all about.
After my discussion with Cathy and Robin, we concluded that the bottom line was, “Give them step-by-step instructions that are simple and easy to understand and then teach through example.” The best way I can inspire anyone to do Conflict REVOLUTION is to do it myself, get the miraculous results, and then share that with people who need inspiration. Because the truth is, in that moment you are the only one who can make that decision. I can’t get into your head and make you think different things. I can’t force you to breathe emotion through your body. Only you can make that decision in that moment, and those are the hardest moments in which to make them.
So much of our culture and the way that people have traditionally resolved conflict is sitting down with the person and saying, “We need to talk through our issues.” Sometimes that works, for a while. But it doesn’t get very deep. The object of Conflict REVOLUTION is helping each individual find peace within the self, and in doing that, to contribute on a global level to the collective consciousness of peace as well.
I have several conflicts, the original conflicts that excited me and made me want to do this. Something happened a few days ago with Cathy where she was in that state of overwhelming emotion and runaway thoughts. We did a revolution, and it was so remarkable that I decided to revamp the conflict I’m going to bring—although there are so many good ones to share—and I want to ask those of you who are listening, whether it’s live or after the fact, to bring a conflict of your own to this session. It doesn’t have to be any particular conflict. You can learn Conflict REVOLUTION using any conflict you want, but I like to advise people to bring one that entails another human being, because it’s a lot easier to look in the mirror of another human being and see yourself than it is to look in the mirror of, say, war or financial crisis. It’s not impossible. I have done every kind of conflict under the sun. But if you use somebody who’s in your life, it’ll give you a better opportunity to see yourself.
Get a pad and paper. You’ll be writing things down. You can work your conflict along with us. At the end, you’ll have your own action plan, something that tomorrow morning before you get out of bed you can have right there by your bedside. You can start your day with a prayer of gratitude—“Thank you for another amazing, miraculous day of life. I fully intend—” set your intention—“to watch myself today,” and here’s your action plan of what you will do, the decisions you will make. Also name your conflict. That is the beginning of creating what we call sound bites. Sound bites are essential because your imagination and your intellect and your reasoning can talk to you ad nauseam about whatever you’re obsessed over in a conflict. You can go on and on in your head. We all have done it. When we start to develop sound bites, we’re paring down meanings, getting to a simpler place. Naming it is an important piece. Every conflict for me is a case study. I can say, “Ah, the Headache Project!” or “I’m a Liar!” and I know the whole conflict. So name your conflict.
We’re going to start with step-by-step instructions. Based upon my conversations with Robin and Cathy, this is what we have come up with as the simplest way to understand Conflict REVOLUTION. The first piece is that this is one-sided work. This is not conflict resolution, where you sit down and make sure you have good sentence structure and tone and you look in people’s eyes and try to resolve something. It’s not that. This is one-sided work. In fact, the ground rule is: your domain is your responsibility. It is not your responsibility to take care of somebody else’s conflict, and someone else is not responsible for taking care of your conflict. Your domain is your responsibility.
The values that we use when we’re doing this one-sided work are:
To be nonjudgmental. Remember, this is a science experiment. It’s not a priest telling you you’re bad or good.
To have passion. In this life we have to train ourselves that we not only have the right to feel all of our feelings, but we have the responsibility to feel all of the emotion that is flowing through us. That’s what passion is. We’ll find out as we go forward that emotion is the creative juice of the manifestation of everything physical. But to us personally, it is our life force. It’s the first dimension in the building block of who we are.
To have creativity. Remember, this is a creative process, so we’re looking outside the box, we’re pushing ourselves to think in new ways, we’re canoodling with metaphors that will reveal themselves to us.
To have humor. If you can’t laugh at yourself, we will. You are free to laugh at me, because humor is so important in getting us out of a stuck place.
So when you find yourself being judgmental, shift over to a nonjudgmental point of view. One way to do that is, if you’re judging something to be bad, purposefully find the good in it. Or if you’re clinging to something that’s good, purposefully find the bad in it. Then you have the whole picture and you’re nonjudgmental. When you’re lacking passion, get in touch with emotion. That’ll get those juices flowing again. When you’re stuck, reach for your creativity.
This is the basic description that we’ll work with of who you are, the picture we’ll be painting. You have three human dimensions that work together to create your ability to have a human experience in the physical world. Think of it as a wave that starts at your feet, flows up through your body, all the way through the top of your head, and when it comes out there, it goes around again and starts again at your feet. There’s the flow of your life force. It’s like a string. The three human dimensions are Emotion, located in your solar plexus, Intuition, located in your heart or your chest area, and Intellect, located in your head.
Now you have three separate places that we’ll also begin to associate with those things so we can begin to separate those three human dimensions from one another. Because we have all been operating as if it’s just one big crazy mass of energy, and it’s hard to tell what Intellect is, what Emotion is. We’re thinking about a feeling, we’re thinking about a conflict, and we think we’re feeling it. There is some Emotion in there, there always is, but this will help us separate them and understand their roles clearly.
The last piece of this puzzle is what we call the Witness. That is the part of you that has the ability to step back and watch your Emotion, Intuition, and Intellect, to observe those three human dimensions. Maybe you’d call that the observer of self. Maybe you’re looking at your human self from your soul self. Maybe it might feel like dissociation. That Witness will help facilitate making decisions in those conflicted moments.
Very basically, Emotion, or feelings, in the solar plexus is not just what we typically think of as emotions—sadness, happiness, joy, anger. In my new book Einstein et al., there are two pages in nine-point type on Emotion. There’s a huge range of Emotion. We’ve been taught to only feel the good ones, and even that—I was never taught how to do that effectively. But in Conflict REVOLUTION we’ll learn how to feel the entire range of feelings. That’s a way to get the flow moving. We want to have a circular flow of our string constantly moving through us like water. Emotion is the fuel, the primordial soup, as it were, of energy that’s the beginning step of the creation of the physical world through our bodies, our perception of it. At that level there’s no thinking, no reasoning, no reasons why you feel this way, there’s nothing to do about it. There’s just pure, unadulterated Emotion.
As that flow moves up into the heart, where Intuition is situated, we have Emotion now becoming a voice. Our emotions guide us, and Intuition becomes the voice of what we call Compassion. In Conflict REVOLUTION, Compassion is the fifth fundamental force of the universe, the intelligence within us that is impelling the creation of the physical world—the garden, the earth—one step at a time, starting with zero and sequentially walking into the infinity of the universe. Compassion, among other things, impels us to work for the good of the whole system. You might call it God, Goddess, the universe. It is the life force that at its root is programmed to take care of all parts of the entire system, creating all parts of it.
Within you, the voice of Intuition is telling you the next step to take, the next decision to make that will be good for the whole situation that you’re in at that moment. It’s important to redefine Intuition here as something that first of all, everyone has as part of their functioning system, and secondly, is meant to tell you what to do in present moment. It’s always sending you signals: “Beat, heart. Breathe,” those kinds of subliminal impelling. It’s always telling you the next thing you can do that will be best for the whole situation. Making decisions for the good of the whole, that’s Compassion. You take care of yourself first and you look outside and see everything else that’s needed and you make a decision to the best of your ability that will benefit the whole situation. That’s what we’re looking for here.
It starts with the three human dimensions. When we understand how they all work together and we begin by taking care of ourselves, we come back to the physical world whole, aligned to Compassion, ready to be a peacemaker, ready to contribute to world peace, not just working from our ego or what we think should be intellectually.
You’ve got Emotion that flows up into your chest area and becomes Intuition, and it’s impelling you to take a step. When it flows up into the Intellect, that’s where all of the descriptions of the physical world lie. So within you you have Emotion that will be the chair. As it flows up into your heart and your Intuition says to that part of you, “Go be a chair,” and it gets into your Intellect, there’s a description. It starts out, “I am a green chair sitting in the corner in Wisconsin in 2017.” But then it flips, like the lens of an eye or a revolution, to, “That is a chair in the corner.” That is a very basic explanation of how these three dimensions work. All of this is projected through and perceived by your body. Even though the chair is in the corner over there, it begins within you.
What happens in the Intellect, however, is that imagination comes in, rationalization, patterns of thinking you don’t even know you have that were drilled into you as a child, as a baby, even. And for those of you who believe in past lives, sometimes we have thoughts, feelings, senses, memories, and energies of past lives coming through us, infiltrating our thinking process. So when you are triggered by a negative emotion, you also trigger degenerative thoughts that wed to that emotion, and that becomes a reality.
I was working with a woman the other day who was saying, “I’m so mad because S. will never, ever, ever stay one minute longer for her shift to help out. She just won’t do it.” I said, “Did you ask her?” “Well, no.” “Why don’t you?” So she called her. “Oh, yes, I’d be happy to!” How long would that woman have walked around with an angry emotion married to the thought that S. never does anything? How does that affect her relation with S.?
Our job here is to keep all emotions flowing, listen to the intuitive impelling, and then Intellect, instead of rationalizing and projecting and getting all clogged up with imagination, is meant to hear that impelling of Intuition and make the decision to take action to fulfill the intuitive impelling. Because here’s the catch: free will operates in the intellectual arena. You don’t make a decision with your solar plexus or with your heart. You implement decision-making in your intellectual area. That’s where free will takes place. Your Intuition can be telling you, “Rest,” but your Intellect can be saying, “No, I can’t rest. I don’t have time to rest. If I rest, bad things will happen.” You make the decision to keep working. That is the basic kind of conflict that we first resolve within ourselves—and it changes everything.
We’ll hear some stories in a minute from the trainers about how they’ve used it and the miraculous outcomes they’ve had. I could write a whole case study book about the miraculous outcomes when we do this work. When I say “miracle,” I mean facilitating a result that I could not have facilitated by going directly into the arena of the conflict. I could not have facilitated this outcome that came up had I sat down with my client and talked to the issues. That’s the miracle. Those are the miracles we’ll create.
The Witness part of you also operates in the intellectual arena. It’s stepping back, taking notes. “Look at me thinking I can’t do that. Look at me being judgmental. Look at all that deep anxiety in my solar plexus. Listen, there’s Intuition telling me what to do.” The Witness, the observer, has the ability to inspire you to make those different decisions. When you know what decisions you should be making, it doesn’t guarantee that you’ll make them, but it’s a much easier step to be inspired to make them.
With all that said, I’ll share my conflict. It’s called “Assumptions and Miscommunications.” This will be an epic conflict for the rest of my life because I learned so much through it. The one I was originally going to do was a woman I was coaching with a miraculous outcome. She named hers “Tiptoeing through the Minefields of Facebook.” I thought, “Raise your hand if you’ve never been triggered by something somebody said on Facebook.” Of course, no one has a hand up. So we’ll focus on this and then bring on Robin and Cathy in a minute.
I was coaching Maxinne one-to-one on Conflict REVOLUTION. Here’s something I learned a long time ago: when I coach, I need to have my own conflict that I’m focused on, because there’s a 75% chance that when I coach someone, I will be triggered. I learned this when Teresa McMillian, one of the co-founders and co-authors, my dear friend, years ago finally decided to use Conflict REVOLUTION to address her migraines, which were frequent and horrible. She asked me if I would help coach her. We called her conflict “The Headache Project.” I quickly discovered that I was being triggered by my sister. My sister and I had a lifelong conflict. She gave me a headache. So I could call it the “Headache Project,” and we could get a two-fer.
This is what happened with Maxinne. She has a massage therapy business, and because of some limitations she’s going through right now, she can’t do massages. Her revenue is dependent on the massage therapists who work through her office. She gets a cut of that. We were doing the training. She had an active conflict. She understood that she was working to learn how to make decisions for the good of the whole. She arranged for her massage therapist Judy to have a reading with me. I asked, “Phone or Skype?” She said, “I want to come in person.” I don’t do many readings in person any more, I don’t think it’s necessary, but I honored it because she was Maxinne’s friend.
We made an appointment. The only time that we could do it was if she came to where I was staying at 4:00 and we were done by 5:30 because my hostess was coming home and there was no privacy to do the reading. At 10:00 the morning of the reading, Maxinne got a request for a massage that afternoon that would have put Judy to my place at 4:30 or 5:00. She texted me and said, “Can you move the reading? Can she get there at 5:00?” I said, “No, I can’t, but I can do it by phone.” And I thought, understanding what was going on, that they would definitely take the walk-in traffic and we could reschedule by phone. In my mind that was what was for the good of the whole. So I said, “Have her call me, we’ll reschedule. We’ll do it by phone. It’s no big deal.”
I didn’t hear from anyone, and I just assumed that that’s what they did, because money was the big trigger. She needed money. “Yeah, get money, let’s be abundant, this is wonderful!” So I changed my plans. At 4:00 I was walking out the door, and a woman was walking up and down the sidewalk. Turned out to be Judy, right on time—early, in fact. I got triggered in that moment. I told her, “I thought you had canceled.” She said no. I did the reading. When I asked what she wanted, she didn’t seem as if she were in emotional distress. She just wanted to see what channeling was. That triggered me a bit, like I was on display. But it was a beautiful reading. I did my quick revolution and really enjoyed the reading. She was buoyed by it.
Later that night, I got an email from Maxinne. She was pissed. She said, “Why could you not have moved her appointment to 5:00? I just lost $80? How is that good for the whole?”
That’s my conflict.
Right now, I want to bring on Robin Cordova, who is also going to share some of her work and her conflict, and then we’ll do ours together, and then we’ll bring Cathy on and she’ll also share.
Good morning, Robin, how are you today?
Robin: Good morning, Barbara, I’m great! Thank you.
Barbara: I want to ask you a question before we get into your conflict. How do you experience the Witness? When I do my Witness, I feel schizophrenic, like I have two voices in my head. But I’m OK with it, because I know what it is. How do you experience the Witness?
Robin: That’s a good visual. I experience it as a healthy split. I know that part of me is splitting off to step outside of myself and pay attention to what’s happening around me, listening to my thoughts and my feelings. I try to make sure to ground myself as well.
Barbara: Ah, good idea! How do you do that?
Robin: I use the circle visualization that you explained in the opening. That’s the most powerful thing when I feel off-center or woozy from becoming a Witness. I ground with that circle visualization that you guided us there at the beginning.
Barbara: Great. What conflict are you bringing?
Robin: A long-time coworker and I, someone I’ve been working with for about 15 years, we live in different states. When we work together, most of our contact is via phone. Sometimes we’ll be in person together, but primarily it’s via phone. We architect and sell mission-critical computer systems, and often our projects take months. They’re difficult. There are a lot of obstacles. In my opinion, the only way to get through them is to be optimistic, to have perseverance, to be grateful for things that are going well, to stay focused and hopeful and work toward solutions. That’s the only way we’ll get through.
Robin: We were going through about a year where things weren’t going well. We had a corporate customer where things were crashing. When systems crash, corporations lose millions of dollars every minute, and it can become quite stressful. When we’d get on the phone, instead of trying to focus on what went well and how we could solve the problem, he wanted to rant and complain and rage and express his frustration at things that were out of his control. Often, especially during this period when we were going through a difficult time, we were talking daily. He’d spend an extra 20 minutes on the phone with me beyond the purpose of the call just to dump all of his negative emotions on me. I’d end up switching into a coaching rescue mode. There’s a difference between coaching and rescuing.
Robin: Coaching is a healthy function; rescuing is an unhealthy function. I was finding myself in the unhealthy function of trying to rescue him and bring him back up emotionally and take on more than my responsibility and trying to fix things and make it OK. I’d hang up zapped of energy. I’ll get to the emotion when we’re ready for that part.
Barbara: Did you name your conflict?
Robin: Yes: “Mr. Downer.”
Barbara: (laughs) That’s good! So we’ve got your “Mr. Downer” and my “Assumptions and Miscommunications.” We’ve laid them out. For those of you who are doing this at home, you can start to see as we move forward what we’ll do with all this information. We’ll identify the three human dimensions within the conflict. It doesn’t matter where you start putting your matrix together. This will be your action plan when you get done. I wouldn’t suggest starting with Intuition. That’s hard, especially if you have an active conflict and you have emotions and thoughts going on. It’s hard to winnow out what the intuitive message is. I’ll start with the intellectual sound bites. The reason we create sound bites is because the imagination and the Intellect can run crazy wild all over you, and you get lost in it.
Barbara: We’re trying to pare down the whole story of the conflict into one or two sentences about what is really bugging you here with the root of the problem with Mr. Downer. What is my problem with Maxinne? You get them so they’re small so a) you can remember them and b) you can call upon them in those times when we get to the process a little later on.
Barbara: For me, [the conflict with Maxinne] was a very easy conflict to parboil down to intellectual sound bites, and one of the great things for me was how quickly I did it. It happened after I stopped. My intellectual sound bites were, “She’s making all kinds of assumptions. She’s not communicating very well.” For a brief time, my Intellect went to, “You know, she never called me back to confirm. She assumed that I did this and that.” But quickly, those two sound bites helped guide me to the next step. My Emotion was irritation, anger, confusion, frustration, impatience. For those of you who are doing this, when you’re trying to identify the emotion of it, don’t go into the reasons why you think you feel this. That’s an intellectual activity. We are looking just to identify and isolate the emotion around this conflict. They should be one-word answers. Robin, how did you get to your intellectual sound bites?
Robin: That’s a good reminder, to separate the Intellect and just focus on the Emotion. I’ll start there. I was feeling furious and outraged and resentful, quite frankly, drained of energy, and that’s what made me feel resentful. Exasperated. I would assign fairly strong emotions in this particular conflict.
Barbara: What about the intellectual sound bite?
Robin: The intellectual sound bite was, “He’s so pessimistic. He’s always hopeless. He brings me down and drains me. And he doesn’t care about the burden he puts on me.”
Barbara: Oh, gosh, I’ve had sound bites like that. (laughs) “They just don’t understand me!”
Robin: (laughs) Exactly!
Barbara: When we’re trying to find the Intuition, it’s a little trickier. Sometimes you can try to think of what Jesus would tell you to do, what a great spiritual leader would tell you to do, what your best friend who knows you and loves you and is kind would tell you to do, what your caring mother would tell you to do if you can’t figure it out. Oftentimes we get into places where we have intense emotions and thoughts about the other person, and it’s hard to separate those out.
Barbara: For me, very quickly, I heard, “Look at yourself.” It’s a form of, “Do the work, do the revolution, do your process.” Because I know that when I do the process, I get the miracle. What will inspire me to do that process when I’m in that place? That was to look at myself and to be kind. Those were the two intuitive messages. And remember also that Intuition is a small, declarative statement that will tell you to do something and that it’s about the next step to take. We can’t figure out what Intuition will tell you to do when you get into a situation. It’s all about present moment and what that Intuition is picking up about the situation and what’s good for the whole. Here we’ll imagine that it’ll work that way, but just understand, as you go forward with your Intuition, that it’s all about what will happen in present moment, not what will happen next week. What was your Intuition telling you?
Robin: There are two branches that came out of this. The first nugget of Intuition I received was to set up boundaries. That was the very first thing I needed to do. It was not my responsibility to make him happy. That was a direct action that I had to take for this conflict, but it wasn’t the full revolution.
Barbara: We’ll get to that in a minute.
Robin: Initially, my Intuition said, “Set up boundaries.” It was a nugget of three words. That was my first step.
Barbara: So now we have our matrix. We have our intellectual sound bites. We have identified what our emotions are. We did some conjecture about what Compassion would want us to do for the good of the whole. I’ll introduce Cathy in a minute, but I want to get to two things about the intellectual sound bites. Our next step is to revolve those sound bites back onto us. “I had poor communication. I was making assumptions.” In this case you would revolve yours to figure out that you had hopelessness, right?
Robin: Yes. And I had to find where I was also pessimistic, which originally was, “I’m not pessimistic! I’m the most optimistic person I know!” (laughs) I’ll get to that more later.
Barbara: For those of you doing this at home, create that revolved sound bite and have that ready. I want to bring on Cathy right now and have her share some things that went on, and then we’ll all rev this together and give you an idea of how it works across the board. Good morning, Cathy!
Cathy: Good morning! I’m doing great, how are you?
Cathy: I would like to share that I loved how Robin talked about the rescuer and the coach, because it’s so easy for me to slip from one to the other. As far as Conflict REVOLUTION for me, when we first learned this years ago, the thing I learned that helped me the most was that I was talking about and thinking about my feelings versus feeling and breathing them through my body. And understanding the differences, a clear definition about Emotion, Intellect, and Intuition helped me to go forward and made my life much easier. Barbara spoke about leading by example. I had an experience yesterday that was so interesting. I have a conflict that I’ve named “Being Blocked from All Directions.” That’s where I had a Con Rev within a Con Rev. The other one is called “No Longer Being Here.” That’s about my daughter Lori and my son-in-law Craig.
Cathy: Yesterday morning I was working with my friend Tammy getting to a core issue that was preventing her from manifesting the money, the job, the home, the man. She felt like she was being blocked from all directions. We were going through the process of Conflict REVOLUTION, and she stopped and said, with much passion, “You’re blocking me also. Why do you do that? I’ve watched you receiving help from all your other friends, and yet you’ve blocked every offer I give you. I offered to cook a meal for you, do the dishes, help you during chemo, but you deny my help. Why do you do that?” That was a case where when you talk about how you can come into Conflict REVOLUTION at any level, I’m not even sure I had a conscious sound bite, but I went right into the feeling and the breathing.
Barbara: Because you were obviously triggered?
Cathy: Yes. “What is my truth? What can I tell her? What can I answer her?” I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. I had the back story. I told myself that the reason for not letting her help me was that she hadn’t been through cancer or chemo and she was unable to understand and give me the support I needed. But right there, I went into feeling and breathing so I could get to my intuitive message.
Barbara: What was it?
Cathy: “Tell her the truth.” And at that moment, the truth came to me: “I don’t trust you.” To be able to tell her—because we had a past experience that was a misunderstanding. She thought I was sleeping with her boyfriend and sent terrible text messages demanding that I confess to her. She was so convinced that I was guilty that it got really ugly. We had become friends again, but I had kept her at arm’s length and refused to accept any help she was offering me because I was so angry that I didn’t trust her enough to let her all the way in. That was so empowering. And then talk about leading by example: in the middle of coaching her through her conflict, I had to stop and feel and breathe to help us go forward.
Barbara: Let’s leave that one right there and go to the one we worked on.
Cathy: Friday I had a call from my daughter. She was crying. She was afraid that her husband was dead. Her phone had died. She had to borrow a phone to call me. There was no way for her to go home. She had left for work that morning and couldn’t find him anywhere. He had been threatening, “You’ll miss me when I’m gone.” She had to go to work. She checked the house, the barn, couldn’t find him anywhere. She goes to work and she’s devastated all day long because she doesn’t know whether he’s alive or dead. That’s why I called that conflict “No Longer Being Here.”
Cathy: I dropped what I was doing and drove over and checked on him and found out that he was still there. He had hid from her that morning when she left for work to make her feel bad. He figured once he was dead, she would miss him when he was gone, and by hiding from her, it gave her a taste of that.
Cathy: I was so overwhelmed with how to deal with that the next day that I had to go back to Conflict 101 and call you, Barbara, and ask for some guidance through this because I was so frustrated myself I couldn’t get my sound bites. When we finally got to them, they were, “He was good at manipulating. He wasn’t helping the situation. And what if he wasn’t here any more?”
Cathy: Those are my sound bites.
Barbara: What was the Emotion? This is really intense.
Cathy: Completely overwhelmed, frustrated. This goes back to how I want to be the rescuer, so I go in and try to fix the situation. Overwhelmed and frustrated. It was so overwhelming I couldn’t think clearly.
Barbara: When we get overwhelmed, sometimes we have all the feelings super-sized.
Barbara: What intuitive message was in this conflict?
Cathy: I had to ask for help. That’s why I called and asked for guidance through this. Even though I automatically know this process and it comes to me so quickly and I go through it without even consciously knowing what I’m doing sometimes, this one blocked me so much that when I stopped to feel and breathe, the intuitive message was, “Ask for help.”
Barbara: It’s interesting, as an aside, how these two conflicts involve asking for help.
Cathy: (laughs) Yes!
Barbara: When Cathy and I talked in the morning, originally we were going to talk about the layout of the show, but then she came in this state and asked me to coach her. I shared with her the content I had already formulated talking about with Robin, and we thought it was a wonderful opportunity to show in real time that this really works. You were the guinea pig, in that place where emotions were intense and thoughts were out of control. You were having the conflict and we were breaking down the pieces at the same time. Oftentimes when somebody’s in a training session or a workshop, they’re not actively engaged. It’s not a triage moment. It’s an intellectual story. But you were in that moment. When we got to the place where we said, “Let’s imagine what the Intuition would have told you to do,” all we had to do was look back and identify what that was, and it was, “Ask for help.” And you asked for help. It’s beautiful how Conflict REVOLUTION becomes an operating system, and not only does your Intuition tell you to ask for help, but then your Intellect dials the phone to get the help. You don’t have to say, “I don’t need help.”
Cathy: And yes, thank you for helping me define this, because I’m still in the middle of processing all of that. It just happened this weekend. Just trying to explain it to someone, I appreciate your help in clarifying what we’re going through with this. And it works.
Barbara: And also—and I think Robin will address this as well—my conflict happened very quickly and was revolved and resolved quickly, and I quickly got to the miraculous place that I’ll share in a minute. But more often than not, it takes time to do this. In talking about, say, Mr. Downer, Robin, now that you’ve had the revolution back to yourself, I think we need to share what the process is that we now do. There are two components to it. One is to deal with Emotion in a new way: to breathe it, not to analyze it. The other is to change the thought to which the Emotion is marrying itself to create your reality and then change the thinking process. These are two big things. These aren’t easy to do. Tell us about processing Mr. Downer.
Robin: It went off into two branches. That’s why I wanted to share that conflict. It will help people to see that sometimes we have to work things in multiple ways. With him, I had to take action steps to get that relationship to a healthy place. That required setting up boundaries and seeing that my kindness is helpful for people, but that there’s a shadow side to kindness, too. We let ourselves be taken advantage of, we feel that we have to take responsibility for someone else’s happiness.
Robin: For him, I needed to set up healthy boundaries and take myself out of that responsibility because I needed my energy to solve the technical issues of what was going on. It wasn’t my responsibility to prop him up. But then I had to step back into the Witness and work with the deeper sound bites, which were the pessimism and hopelessness. At first I couldn’t see it in my life. There are so many areas in my life where I’m very optimistic. I had to step back further into the Witness and ask the greater part of me, “Show me where I’m pessimistic.” I think oftentimes when we’re not seeing it we can ask that greater part of ourselves to show us, and then step further into the Witness and watch what comes up and look for deeper intuitive messages.
Robin: Over time, I found that it was in the intimate relationship part of my life. Not my work life, not my life as a mother, a coach, an athlete. All of those things I’m very hopeful and optimistic in. But when I think about going out on a date or feeling that I was somehow going to be successful in a romantic relationship in my life, I wasn’t hopeful. I was pessimistic. That’s where my work was.
Barbara: That’s a great illustration of why conflicts are so hard to address. When you see something like this, you realize that his trigger of you into this place was your energy calling you to look way over here at a place that had nothing to do with him. How long do you think this went on?
Robin: I talked with you about it several times during this period, and I’m a year in right now. It was right at this time last year when I realized I need to set boundaries. It took some time to work with the Emotion, to realize where the pessimism was, and to come up with an action plan. I’m just now starting to make some headway in both a new relationship with my coworker—because I still have to work with him—and a new relationship with my own optimism and hopefulness in the romantic relationship area of my life. It takes time and patience and being committed to self-love and self-compassion. That’s crucial for this work.
Barbara: You brought up this question, and then Cathy brought it up, and as you were talking I was thinking about some conflicts I have about when we want to be nice. I had a year-long conflict called “The Kitchen Dishes.” My roommate was leaving dishes in the sink. You would have thought I could just say, “Hey, can you clean up your dishes?” But I couldn’t. I was being hammered in my brain about how small I was that I wouldn’t just wipe off this bowl for her, thinking I wasn’t being nice enough, I was so selfish. While you were trying to set those boundaries, were you struggling with some of those kinds of voices?
Robin: Definitely! Having to do things I wouldn’t normally do, such as let his calls go to voicemail so that I could listen to the message and stay focused on doing a good job with just the technical part. My job isn’t to prop him up emotionally, it’s to work the issues. I didn’t have to spend 20 extra minutes on the phone working through his emotion and then be so drained that I couldn’t do my job well.
Barbara: Getting back to the moments where we’re feeling Emotion, we have the Intuition. “I’m going to set some boundaries.” You let it roll to voicemail, where you were making a decision to set a boundary, to do things differently, but there’s anxiety, shame, and thoughts about how you’re not a nice person.
Barbara: This is why it can take a year or more sometimes, and this is one reason why I was inspired to do this show, because Maxinne came back after her first night of feeling and breathing and noticing these terrible thoughts, and she said, “I was feeling and breathing all night and nothing changed.”
Robin: And then she gets into a cycle of being hard on herself.
Barbara: Yes. This is our pattern. But with her, I said that there might not be a change in that moment, but what’s different is, you’re observing yourself now. That’s the first step. When you observe and experiment, it changes. The very fact that she’s observing it is a beginning step.
Robin: Yes. We have to honor the process, not the results, praise ourselves for the process. Like you’ve said many times, we are building a new operating system. It’ll take time. We’re reworking our brains, our thinking process. To learn to stop, to feel, to breathe, to step into the Witness, to honor the small steps is so crucial.
There’s another thing you’ve always said that was very helpful, too: using the question “Is this regenerative or degenerative?” When you get a moment of, “Oh, I’m not kind enough. This feels awkward,” when we’re growing, it will feel awkward, because we’re doing something different, so we’ll feel a little bit awkward. Ask yourself, “Is this a regenerative or a degenerative step?” If it’s regenerative, it’s probably good for the whole.
Barbara: Yes. In this instance, the phone rings and you see it’s your coworker, you let it go to voicemail, which is making a decision for the good of all, but you’re still feeling bad, thinking bad thoughts, but you’ve made that decision.
Robin: Good point. That happens in the free will. “This feels awkward because you pride yourself on doing a good job and not letting people down.” But you’re only stopping the degenerative part. I was still planning to hear the voicemail and respond to what was needed, but I didn’t have to put myself on the phone for 20 minutes in a degenerative state.
Barbara: Right. And in the case of my “Kitchen Dishes” conflict, after a year of it, I was embarrassed to talk about it to anybody who knows Conflict REVOLUTION. When I finally got the aha moment and the miracle, I was talking to my sister about it, and she reminded me that when I was little, my mother used to work long hours, and I would clean up the whole kitchen. She would come home after a 12-hour workday and find the one thing I didn’t do and yell at me.
Barbara: And when I got that, I was able to go back to my roommate and start the conversation, “Hey, would you mind if we—?” She got a little defensive, and suddenly I’m weeping and we are having the best conversation! She said, “Don’t ever, ever, ever not tell me these things.” So we built trust, and it was all divine timing. Since then our relationship has deepened so much that I don’t want her to go. I used to be like, “I’m glad I have a roommate, I love her, but I wish I lived alone.” Now I think, “No! Don’t leave me!” (laughs)
Barbara: Cathy, tell me what happened after we talked and you had the thing happen with Tammy. What about the conflict with your son-in-law?
Cathy: Let me close up the conflict we were working called “Being Blocked in All Directions.” My question was, “What is my truth?” So “What is my truth with Tammy?” follows into “What is my truth with my family?” Not only did my being asked to tell her the truth—that I didn’t trust her and why I didn’t—help open up the tensions and the blocks in my relationship with Tammy, but it helped her. We did more Con Rev on her story, and she had a breakthrough to realize that in the incident where she felt like I and everybody else were blocking her, this is a core issue. She’s feeling people blocking her from all directions from her abundance. Maybe that will be the change and she’ll open up those blocks and start healing on a new level so she can get her abundance on all levels.
Cathy: Going back to “What is my truth?,” when I come back to the story with Craig and Lori, maybe Craig was threatening to commit suicide, and instead of my being so angry and frustrated with this “evil” man, what if he’s the person who is showing Lori that she can be a different way so she no longer wants to commit suicide but wants to figure out how to get through her life without so much conflict? The fact that he is threatening and she is saying, “No, don’t do this,” that’s their conflict. So I’m thinking all along that this is their problem, when my truth is, my biggest fear and my deepest core issue is my fear of dying, of no longer being there.
Cathy: Going through that, I feel like I’m able to look at my issues of dying. My first husband was threatening to kill me, and now chemo is threatening to kill me, cancer is threatening to kill me, so how do I get what I want in life? I’m realizing that maybe I don’t need cancer any more to get what I want out of life. I’m still processing all of this.
Barbara: Yeah, wow!
Cathy: You can see how this all ties together! All this weekend I was like, “Whoa!” (laughs)
Barbara: A back story is that you’ve been dealing with Lori, who is suicidal, and she’s just recently decided that she wants to live and she’s been struggling to establish a life for herself and making better decisions. Craig is basically committing a slow suicide in front of everyone.
Cathy: Thank you for articulating that!
Barbara: And you and I talked about how Craig is Lori’s—as Carlos Castaneda used to call it—“petty tyrant.” He is the impetus who is pushing her, giving her the platform to rise above that behavior in herself. He’s playing an important role for her right now, even though they may not end up married. He might kill himself. He might not. You’re seeing Lori changing her life, obviously influenced by being raised watching her father trying to kill her mother and do harm to her. She’s breaking that pattern, and now it’s coming back to you, when you’re on chemo for cancer. We’ve done some work since you were diagnosed and chose to get chemo. That was breathtaking, because I know you want to live. But it seemed like when we revolved—and now we’ll get to the last revolution of the sound bites—“What if he’s not here any more? What if you’re not here any more? I want to be here.”
Barbara: “I want to live.”
Cathy: Like I said, I was thinking it was all their problem. I didn’t realize what core issue of my own I was bringing to the surface.
Cathy: Very powerful!
Barbara: Yes! Going back to my quick conflict, “I’m miscommunicating. I’m making assumptions.” When I asked myself what assumptions I was making and where I was not communicating well, oh, my gosh! First of all, I assumed that Maxinne and Judy canceled the appointment. I didn’t communicate well on why Judy couldn’t have come at 5:00. When I said to the universe, “Show me now as I move forward where I make assumptions,” I saw that I make assumptions all day long!
At that moment, every time I started to make an assumption about Maxinne or Judy, I stopped and said, “Wait a minute. Show me what the answer to this question is. Why did we have to do it in person? I assumed that Judy was curious and wanted to take advantage of—no! Why?” And then I realized that she had never seen a channel. A lifelong goal of hers was to be in the presence of someone who channels. She’s heard about them. She’s read them. Maxinne has told her, and now here’s a woman she trusts, because Maxinne is one of her best friends, and it’s really important for her to get there at 4:00 to be in the same space because this may not come again.
Barbara: When I realized that, without making an assumption about why she wanted it to be in-person, it came to me. Oh, so even though I thought it was best for the whole if they took the money, that extra money she would have made wasn’t nearly as important as getting to that appointment to be in the presence of a channel. This was like a treasure hunt. There was no shame involved, no degenerative voice in my head saying, “What’s wrong with you? You always make assumptions!” There was no icky feeling. There was the joy of discovery. And by the next day, Maxinne, too, was observing and making different decisions and thinking different thoughts and feeling and breathing, and we were able to put together all of our assumptions, and we got the big picture. We said, “Look at this! We never would have been able to do this without Conflict REVOLUTION!”
Barbara: And then it continued when I went to New Orleans and my friend never called me back. I could use this, not make assumptions, not respond, and the long and short of it was, I had her phone blocked and I didn’t even know it! I could have done a big thing about her failings, but I didn’t. I had a great time, even though she wasn’t there.
Barbara: Let’s go to Robin. When you found those places in your love life where you were pessimistic and hopeless, where did that take you?
Robin: That’s the beauty of Conflict REVOLUTION: you often end up solving something that’s very deep and meaningful. That’s why the Emotion is so strong. In my case, I had to look at how I build up hopefulness in my life and realize that this is something I truly valued and wanted in my life and had not been successful in. That was sad. That was creating a sense of hopelessness. Pessimistic thinking is often aligned with feeling personally flawed. In my case I was feeling unworthy and unlovable. It sent me back to doing some inner child healing work for being hopeful. I then worked towards setting some goals, like we talked about in January, setting goals and pathways that were achievable for me and that worked for me. I’m still working on these things, but I’m much more hopeful and optimistic now because I could see the problem clearly, which I might not have been able to do without the Conflict REVOLUTION process.
Barbara: Without Mr. Downer?
Robin: Yeah, without Mr. Downer!
Barbara: Bless him!
Robin: And that’s where we have to ask how we can be grateful. I just want to say, Cathy, you’re so brave to come on the show and talk about these vulnerable things that you’re right in the middle of.
Cathy: Thank you.
Robin: I want to acknowledge that, because I have been working on this conflict that I’m sharing for a year. I’m excited for you and the beautiful things that will unfold. I’m busy with the work now, coming back to going into the Witness. How is this going? Am I feeling and breathing and paying attention to those thoughts? Not letting myself tell myself I’m flawed and unworthy and unlovable?
Cathy: Thank you, Robin. For me, the process of Con Rev is amazingly powerful. When we go forward creating our lives, my main goal is to consistently ask to be aware. I want to be aware of when I’m not telling the truth to other people and especially to myself. I want to be aware when I’m feeling fear and sorry for myself and afraid of not being here any more, to be able to step back and be the Witness, the observer who can see when I’m cheating myself out of a lovely life because of all my bullshit.
Barbara: What was interesting about our work yesterday was when you said, “This cancer has caused me to ask for more help, and I’m finding out how loved I am.”
Cathy: It’s so huge. I don’t have to create cancer to know that people love me and care about me. I have been given so many gifts, from emotional support to money to gifts to food to people helping me, driving me to my appointments. I lost my 12-year-old granddaughter to cancer last year. I went through depression that I didn’t realize I was going through, feeling like I didn’t have any purpose in life any more, not realizing why, not realizing I was in depression. I was pulling myself away from the world and not doing anything or going anywhere. Creating the cancer has opened me up to realizing, “Wow, I don’t need to have an illness to go forward with my goals.”
Barbara: And when you were describing all the things you were gaining from having the cancer, my response was, “I have all those things, and I don’t have cancer. I feel so loved.”
Cathy: I know!
Barbara: That was sort of an Aha! for both of us.
Cathy: Yes, yes! We all want to be loved and accepted and adored and cradled and happy! (laughs)
Barbara: Have you created any kind of action plan from our work going forward about wanting to live?
Cathy: The basic one is that sometimes I need to breathe and remember to step back into my Witness and observe what I’m doing. As I go forward, I choose to be more aware of when I am not doing the things that I want to do, like telling the truth and being honest with myself and allowing myself to go out and create the love and all the joy that I’m getting without being sick. Those are my steps going forward.
Barbara: In our matrix, the action plan, the last step of the sound bites we’re writing down, has those intellectual sound bites defining what we need to do in order to address the original issue. For me, with “Assumptions and Miscommunications,” my action plan is based on my Intuition, which said, “Look at yourself.” My plan going forward is that I’m going to watch where I make assumptions and where I don’t communicate quite as well as I could. As I told you, this is going down in the history of revs, because there are so many things in that one week where I didn’t make assumptions, where I made sure to take that extra step in communication and step back and think, “Have I told everybody everything? Do I need to tell anybody anything else?” And when I find places where I’m not communicating or I make an assumption, there’s no shame. There’s no mentally berating myself. It’s like, “Oh, look, it’s me making assumptions again.”
Cathy: The beauty of you and Robin and me all sharing with each other is that I look at yours and Robin’s sound bites and goals for going forward, and I see how I can now apply those to me. It applies to all of us.
Barbara: Yes. When I do this in a workshop, everyone has a Post-It note on the wall and I write all the emotions at the bottom in red and go all around the room, and when we’re done, you see that it doesn’t matter how different the story line is. My story line from Robin’s story line and especially from your story line and T.’s story line, it’s the same conflicts. It’s the universal emotions that do not get embraced and loved and moving through the flow: anger, depression, sadness, frustration—all the bad stuff is trapped in us, and it becomes cancer. It becomes excessive weight, depression, externally it is separations within families, conflicts within the community, worldwide conflict.
Barbara: We are working at the root level. Listening to both of your conflicts, I’m finding great fodder for my own continued revolutions. Robin?
Robin: Agreed. We all make assumptions. That’s a good one, too! (laughs)
Barbara: It’s so elemental. I’m so grateful to M. We’re coming to the end, but I wanted to ask you: boiling it down into a basic presentation, what do you think is the best way to help people untrain themselves to reject the bad emotions?
Robin: For me, I remind myself that when I’m triggered with Emotion, the first thing I tell myself is, “Don’t have a knee-jerk reaction.” When I get triggered I say, “Oh, there’s work to do.” It creates a new instant response to whatever emotion is happening. I’ve even trained myself to do that with intense joy, because intense joy, the people who run off in Las Vegas have equally had a knee-jerk reaction to extreme joy that may not be good for the whole. With any emotion that’s coming through us, we can stop and say, “I have work to do.” That’s where I begin, and then I remember the process. “Feel and breathe.” I follow the training, the process.
Barbara: Particularly because, having known you this long, it’s been challenging for you to access deep emotion.
Cathy: (laughs) Yes! You asked how we would encourage others. At one time when most of us would take a bad emotion when we were feeling it and tell people, “Don’t feel that way,” when you see someone crying and expressing an uncomfortable emotion. I’m able now to allow them and myself, because I didn’t used to be good at crying at all, to feel those “bad” emotions, because all emotions can lead us some place else. We encourage each other to feel the good and the bad emotions and move them through and then take that—like, if I’m feeling sad, I can’t feel like being happy immediately, but I can take the next step up to whatever emotion makes me feel a little bit better and then a little bit better. Every time I process the ConRev I need to breathe. I breathe to get into my Witness. I breathe to find my truth. I breathe to find my sound bite. Just remembering to feel and breathe has been so powerful to me.
Barbara: Me, too. I want to add an ending to my own conflict. Shortly after or during this time, I had a conflict with my sister—and I was Maxinne! I wrote an email to my sister that sounded just like hers. I sent it off and immediately started to feel and breathe, and I’m so grateful for bringing Conflict REVOLUTION to my family. The sister who triggered me was the one from “The Headache Project.” Long story short, my other sister was involved as well, and she said, “This is not a conversation for email.” So I called her, and she was wonderful. She was triggered, too, but she returned Conflict REVOLUTION to me. She knew how to do it. And pretty soon I was crying, she was crying. She also had something that was coming up. So I waited for a few days and I kept getting Intuition nudging me, “Call the other one.”
Barbara: I was a little less excited, because she traditionally would read me the riot act. But she was also wonderful, so loving and calm. She explained everything. We had a wonderful talk, and we’ll get together when I get home. So you can even act not for the good of the whole and it can come out for the good of the whole.
Barbara: Is there anything else either of you wants to add before we close this and let people go off and think about this and digest it?
Cathy: Thank you, Robin and Barb. When we went through what happened this weekend and I had to ask you for help and you asked me if I would be willing to share in the Sunday morning conference these personal things about me and my family, my first reaction was, “Eeek!” And then I realized that my truth needs to be told, because then I can show by example that not only do people who have been doing ConRev for years and doing it well get stuck and need to ask for help, but also, when you hear my story, you can relate to it and say, “If she can do this, I can fix the issue I have with my boss at work.” I’m so grateful to both of you. I love you both. Thank you for letting me be a part of this—even though I was a little bit scared to do it!
Barbara: The powerful thing about you sharing your story is that I have always believed that Conflict REVOLUTION can heal physical illnesses, it can prevent physical illnesses by not allowing a build-up, an abscess of emotion to get stuck in our bodies. You have shown that this isn’t a replacement for chemo or any kind of physical therapy anybody might be doing with cancer, but I believe it can augment the healing process. I’m looking forward to having you get your clean bill of health.
Cathy: Amen! (laughs)
Robin: In closing, I think we’ve shown by all these examples a good reason why this work is important and why it’s worth it. Maybe listeners are thinking, “This is a lot of effort. I don’t know if I can do it.” But what inspires us is the health, the well-being that come out of it, stronger relationships, the ability to achieve the things that you value in life. In my case, I realized that I value having a partnership and I want to do whatever it takes to get that. My conflict with Mr. Downer is the one that helped me to see that mirror and say, “Wait a minute. I’m draining my own energy by telling myself I’m unworthy and unlovable and I’ll never have a partner or be able to achieve what I want in life.” I didn’t see the pathway, I couldn’t find the next step I needed to take.
Robin: I’m taking a lot of steps, declaring that this is something I value, setting that intention daily, seeing the optimistic side. What am I grateful for? What is working right? What will work for me? How do I combat the thoughts that are telling me that I’m unworthy and unlovable? How do I step into the Witness and catch myself every time I start to beat myself up? Pushing back, wrestling with those thoughts to create more hopefulness. I’m much more hopeful a year into it. I haven’t achieved my goal yet, but I’m very hopeful that I will.
Barbara: And Lily Phelps, on her show we were talking about if Jesus would forgive Hitler, and the answer was, “Of course.” He couldn’t not forgive him, because then he wouldn’t be Jesus. You can’t not achieve that goal, because if we’re going to have a vision and intention and work towards that, then it has to have come true in the future.
Robin: I love that.
Barbara: So we can find hopefulness in that, too. I want to close by telling the people who have listened to this who want to do this work that you can always contact me at Partyof12.com, BarbWith@gmail. I have a number of learning tools. My new book, Einstein et al.: Manifestation, Conflict REVOLUTION, and the New Operating System, is the complete guide. It’s the unified field theory, the maps of human consciousness, and the complete curriculum that will walk you through it. I do some one-on-one coaching. I occasionally have online classes. Come to my website and sign up. There’s a lot of free stuff there as well to download. With this basic information, I think you can start experimenting with yourself and gain control of your own domain. I think I speak for Cathy and Robin and everyone who has been practicing and experiencing the results of Conflict REVOLUTION when I say that then you only will need to watch and be amazed.
Thank you! Until next time! Have a wonderful month! At the end of April we will have Leslie Stewart on talking about joy.